


but i am the chosen one

by orphan_account



Series: there's no need to call me sir, professor [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, F/F, F/M, M/M, Other, forget the fact that they're 10 and fucking each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-04
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-18 03:22:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 32,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5896207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alexander's world turned upside down when he got his letter to Hogwarts.</p><p> </p><p>(I'm sorry for the shitty one sentence summary im just really fucking bad at summaries ok and the world turned upside down thing is overused but idgaf. Its like the fifth time i changed the summary. Hogwarts au. I love you guys already,)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I'm writing a letter nightly

The letter was the most eventful thing that happened in a year.

It was not that life on the island was uninteresting. It was just monotonous. The same chores, the same meals, the same punishments. The same traders who came on the same ships that brought the same goods. Alexander Hamilton was just bored of it.

The letter was tied to a tawny owl. It was unmarked except for Alexander's address, and a red seal.  
Alexander remembered seeing the seal. He remembered how everyone in the town gathered around the owl, trying to take a peek at it. His mother shooed them all off.

"How rude," she said. She ushered him into their house. "Trying to take a look at something that isn't even theirs! Well, go on now Alex, open it."

Alexander opened the letter. _What could it be?,_ he wondered.  _How do they know how to find me?_ It read:

 

 

 

 

 

 

HOGWARTS SCHOOL  _of_  WITCHCRAFT  _and_  WIZARDRY

 

 

 

 

 

 

Headmaster: Minerva McGonagall

_(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,  
Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)_

 

    Dear Mr. Hamilton,

    We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at [Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Hogwarts_School_of_Witchcraft_and_Wizardry). Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

    Term begins on [1 September](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/1_September). We await your owl by no later than [31 July](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/31_July).

    Yours sincerely,

[ ](http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/harrypotter/images/6/67/Minerva_McGonagall_sig.png/revision/latest?cb=20111220005427)

    Minerva McGonagall

    Headmistress

 

"Mother," Alexander exclaimed. "I have been invited to a school? Of magic?" _But it couldn't be. Magic does not exist!_ His mother thought the same.

"Alexander, honey, are you all right?" she cooed. "Are you sure you read it right? I know that you're only 10 and your mind is older, but don't let your childhood fantasies into your real life."

"Mother, I am being serious, read it!" Alexander gave the letter to his mother. He loved her, but she never takes him seriously sometimes. He could see her eyes widen in disbelief as she read the letter.

"Well, how are we supposed to get the materials? Where do we get them? Where is this school?"

"What materials?" asked Alexander. He knew about his financial situation, and buying items for a school that may not even exist would not bring his family out of poverty.

"These materials Alexander. Further down, further down."

    UNIFORM

    First-year students will require: 

    1\. Three sets of plain work [robes](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Robes) (black)
    2\. One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear
    3\. One pair of protective gloves ([dragon](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Dragon) hide or similar)
    4\. One winter cloak (black, with silver fastenings)

    Please note that all pupil's clothes should carry name tags.

    COURSE BOOKS

    All students should have a copy of each of the following:

     _[The Standard Book of Spells](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/The_Standard_Book_of_Spells) (Grade 1)_

     by [Miranda Goshawk](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Miranda_Goshawk)

     _[A History of Magic](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/A_History_of_Magic)_

    _by[Bathilda Bagshot](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Bathilda_Bagshot)_

     _[Magical Theory](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Magical_Theory)_

    _by[Adalbert Waffling](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Adalbert_Waffling)_

     _[A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/A_Beginner%27s_Guide_to_Transfiguration)_

    _by[Emeric Switch](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Emeric_Switch)_

     _[One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/One_Thousand_Magical_Herbs_and_Fungi)_

    _by[Phyllida Spore](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Phyllida_Spore)_

     _[Magical Drafts and Potions](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Magical_Drafts_and_Potions)_

    _by[Arsenius Jigger](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Arsenius_Jigger)_

     _[Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Fantastic_Beasts_and_Where_to_Find_Them)_

    _by[Newt Scamander](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Newton_Scamander)_

     _[The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/The_Dark_Forces:_A_Guide_to_Self-Protection)_

    _by[Quentin Trimble](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Quentin_Trimble)_

     OTHER EQUIPMENT

    

    1 [wand](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Wand)
    1 [cauldron](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Cauldron) (pewter, standard size 2)
    1 set glass or crystal phials
    1 [telescope](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Telescope)
    1 set [brass scales](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Brass_scales)

    Students may also bring, if they desire, an [owl](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Owl) OR a [cat](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Cat) OR a [toad](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Toad).

PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS

ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN [BROOMSTICK](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Broomstick)

 

    Yours sincerely,

[ ](http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/harrypotter/images/5/54/Lucinda_Thomsonicle-Pocus_sig.png/revision/latest?cb=20120407140353)

    [Lucinda Thomsonicle-Pocus](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Lucinda_Thomsonicle-Pocus)

    [Chief Attendant of Witchcraft Provisions](http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Chief_Attendant_of_Witchcraft_Provisions)

 

"This just tells us about the things we will spend our money on," said Alexander. He saw no details as to where to buy his supplies, where the school is located, how to even contact this 'Minerva McGonagall'.  

He read through the letter again. This time he found something strange. On the front page, he saw letters forming, as if someone was updating the paper. The new writing read:

 

Dear Mr. Hamilton, 

It has come to our attention that you are not aware of the wizarding world. This is extremely peculiar to us, as your father is a wizard himself. Your father will be able to tell you about Hogwarts. 

Minerva McGonagall

 

"Father was a wizard?" exclaimed Alexander. He never knew. Did his mother keep this secret from him? Why? How did he have the powers of a wizard? What, exactly, does a wizard do?

"Your father was not a wizard," his mother snapped. "Now, I am sure this is a prank now throw that paper away Alexander. It is nothing but a scam, a trick for us to spend our money worthlessly." 

"It is not a trick," whispered Alexander. He could not understand his mother's change in tone. "Look at the paper."

He handed her the paper. He watched her face carefully as she read the new paragraph, the paragraph that she was certain that she has never seen before. Her face turned ash white. 

"We are supposed to contact your father?" 

"Yes, he's supposed to come home any minute now, right?" He glanced over at the clock. Thirty minutes late. This was so unlike him. "Where is he anyways, he's late."

"Well, Alexander, your father abandoned us."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know what most of this is hogwarts acceptance letters copied and pasted from the hp wiki  
> oops?  
> sorry i wasted ur time  
> i mean it ended on a cliffhanger???????  
> i would tell you the entire plot but that's not how fanfiction works


	2. hamgoestolondon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so i have no idea what to do with this i guess ham gets supplies and stuff idk i didnt really plan this out

"What do you mean our father abandoned us?"Alexander asked. Parents don't do that. Parents don't just leave their child, alone, with nothing but a few dollars to their name.

"He left. He's not coming back. I'm sorry, Alex. I know you adored hi-"

"Why did he leave?" His father can't just leave. He needed his father. Who was to guide him? How was he supposed to grow into adulthood on his own?

"It was my fault," his mother said. She was visibly shaken.  _It is not her fault,_ thought Alexander.  _Do not blame her._ But he just couldn't help it. 

"What did you do?" he asked. "Why did you make him leave?" He knew that his father would not leave because of him or his brother, they all adored each other. His mother, on the other hand, got in frequent arguments with him. 

"Who is to protect us now? Who is to work the fields?" Alexander pressed. His mom was crying now. Alexander knew that he was hurting her, he knew that she knew that he blamed her, but he  _just couldn't stop._

"Who is to provide for us now? We are in serious debt. HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO STAY ALIVE IN THIS WORLD? THIS WORLD THAT IS TRYING TO KILL PEOPLE LIKE US-" He was cut of as somebody suddenly appeared into the room. She was tall and rather severe-looking. She was wearing an emerald green robe and a pointed hat. 

"Excuse me, why are you yelling at your mother," she said. 

"Um, excuse  _me?_ You come into  _my house,_ and you-"

"Young man, I am a representative of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, hold your tone. Now, your mother has sacrificed so much for you and yet you have the  _decency_ to yell at her like she is of lower status than you? Believe me, women are not possessions that you can take your anger out on. I am about to change your life. Now, you show some respect to women or I you can kiss your invitation to Hogwarts goodbye!" 

Alexander Hamilton was speechless. He had never met someone who stood for women like that. He had an immediate respect for her, even though he didn't know who she was. She stood up for he beliefs of equality. 

"Now, I can see that you have received your letter. I am Minerva McGonagall. I am here to inform you about Hogwarts since your father is not here to tell you." 

That ruined the mood.

And so she began talking. She explained how Hogwarts was a school for people gifted with magic. She explained how people had wands and could do magic and spells. She explained how she suddenly appeared in their house, a form of magical transportation called Apparition. She talked about Hogwarts itself, and what he was to do there. 

And Alexander Hamilton found himself entranced. He was curious. He wanted to learn about Transfiguration, about Charms, and Defense Against the Dark Arts. He found himself yearning to learn and read everything about the wizarding world. He learned about the political system, the Ministry of Magic, and found himself wanting to work there. He had an unsatisfiable curiosity. 

"So, whenever you're ready, we can just head over to Diagon Alley and get your materials," finished McGonagall. She had been talking for nearly an hour now, explaining the world of magic. Alexander got up to leave, but his mother stopped him.

"No, no, no, no, NO," said his mother. "I will not let you leave to this school. Not yet."

"Mom, what is the problem?" Alexander asked. "McGonagall here explained basically everything. You've seen magic for yourself now, too! What do you have against me leaving to school?"

"You've said it yourself. How are we supposed to pay the bills for this school. How am I alone supposed to pay the bills for this house, even?" 

"Actually," said McGonagall, "the Ministry of Magic will pay for the expenses of the school because you are a low income family. You need not worry about that. And, Hamilton, please call me Headmistress McGonagall. I will soon be teaching you Transfiguration," she added.

"So, we have everything sorted out, we can leave?" Alexander asked. He couldn't wait to get off of this monotone island and discover the hidden wizarding world.

"Hold on now, Hamilton. You take your time and wish your mother goodbye. I will be back tomorrow to pick you up and bring you to Diagon Alley."

 

            

 

 

"Woah. What is this place? Where are you taking me?" Alexander Hamilton was walking down a street in London, side by side with Minerva McGonagall. They had gotten there by the use of floo powder, another way to get places magically. Alexander was just glad that he didn't completely mess up with the floo powder. 

"You are surprised? We aren't even in the magical part yet," said Headmistress McGonagall. "It's like you have never seen the big city before."

"I haven't," Alexander whispered quietly. That was something he was not proud of. He didn't like being poor, stuck on a small island in the middle of the sea. He wanted to be where the people are, where he could find others of his kind, where he could make a name for himself. 

"Oh. Forgive me for asking."

 

 

"Come, Hamilton. Right this way," said Headmistress McGonagall. She gestured towards a nondescript brick wall, as if it were a portal to a magical wizarding world.

"It's just a wall," said Alexander.

"Hamilton, nothing is what it seems in the wizarding world," McGonagall said. How eerie. She tapped a brick, and the whole wall began to rearrange itself. The bricks formed an archway. It was like magic. 

"Welcome to Diagon Alley."

There were no other words to describe it. It was chaos. There were people of all sorts hustling about, entering and leaving shops, talking to fellow wizards, or just running about making mischief. Oh, and the  _shops._ There were restaurants, clothing stores, candy stores. And then there were the less normal shops. There was a bank that looked like it was being run by goblins. There was a shop that sold nothing but brooms. There was a place with books, some chained up or flying about. There was a place which sold what looked like wands. It was chaotic, it was complicated, it was a  _mess,_ and Alexander loved it. 

"Where to first?" he asked McGonagall. 

"Books? I can see you eying Flourish and Blotts."

"By all means, lead the way."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry im a shit writer i just want to contribute to the fandom
> 
> apparition is spelled right i went on the hp wiki i would know
> 
> sorry my chapters are short af
> 
> yes mcgonagall is a super feminist fight me


	3. Ze' Hogwarts Express

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look I have a real Chapter Title do you see that  
> it's stolen from the actual book  
> IM GONNA GET SUED ARENT I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i have no idea to get around the age thing  
> theyre like 10  
> but theyre gonna be dating and stuff  
> #hogwarts college au  
> idk theyre like college age  
> going into first year hogwarts  
> ok i dont want to think about it  
> but  
> in this chapter  
> i think imma have ham and friends be sorted idk  
> im writing this before i write the actual chapter good idea am i right

_Nothing is what it seems in the wizarding world._ McGonagall's voice echoed through his head. Alexander was standing in the middle of King's Cross Station, where the supposed  _Platform Nine and Three-Quarters_ was located. He knew that it existed, but he couldn't help the doubt threading through his mind. Just to be safe, he arrived 2 hours early. Anxiety just gets to him sometimes. 

Alexander had been standing there for a while now. He did not know how to find Platform Nine and Three-Quarters, and decided to just give in and ask a stranger. As he looked for someone who might have been a wizard or witch, somebody strolled up next to him.

He was taller than him, with long curly hair and a freckled face. He was wearing strange clothes, too. He was pushing a cart holding the same materials as Alexander. Alexander assumed that he was a wizard.

"Hi,"  he asked timidly. "You wouldn't happen to know where Platform Nine and Three-Quarters is, do you? Or are you just a Muggle? Oh, you probably are, I'm so sorry just ignore me I should just go-"

"Hey," the stranger said. "Chill. I'm a wizard. Who are you?" His voice was like a melody. 

"I'm Alexander Hamilton. I go to school here? My dad was a wizard, and my mom was- what was it, muggle? Yeah, muggle." The stranger looked confused. 

"Hey, I'm John Laurens, but how come you have no idea what you're doing and your dad's a wizard. You look so confused, like You-Know-Who is going to come and attack you. Where's your father, anyways?"

"My father left my family," Alexander said quietly. He still didn't believe it. His mind was constantly at war, one side wanting to deny it, and one side blaming everyone around him. His brother, his mother, his friends. 

"Oh. Sorry," said John. John seemed nice. He was very cute and kind. "So, you've never been on the platform before? Do you want me to show you?" Alexander could tell John was trying to make up for the awkward silence after his question. Alexander never felt a close connection with someone that fast before. 

"Sure." John smiled. His smile was like the moon and stars. "So, what you do is you just walk right through that wall."

"Oh, yes, I should have known. Just walk through a solid brick wall," Alexander said. Sarcasm was always one of his strong points. 

"Just watch and learn," said John. He elaborately curtsied and took his cart and ran right through the wall. This dramatic little fucker. 

"Oh, well here we go." Alexander took his cart and sprinted full force into that 'wall'. He was never one to half-ass something. 

John was waiting for him on the other side. 

"You made it! Glad you didn't die. It would suck that I would lose you already." 

"Kinda wish I was dead. Then I wouldn't have to deal with you." 

Oh, they could tell that they would become best friends already. 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

Like all other magical places, Platform Nine and Three Quarters was busy. There were wizards and witches alike, some talking amongst each other, others boarding a large red train. Alexander saw a middle aged man help three girls onto the train. Sisters, perhaps? He saw a kid with poofy hair complain to his parents. It was all quite overwhelming, honestly. 

"Come on, Alex! We're going to be late!" John called for him. He made his way towards John.

"Woah. How did you even know about this place?"

"My dad told me where to find it. He had, uh, work so he, uh, couldn't drop me off."

"Let's get on the train!"

 

 

 

 

They handed someone their trunks, and boarded the train. 

"Let's find a compartment," said John. He grabbed Alex's hand, and led him through the train. They couldn't find an empty compartment, so the went into one with 2 boys sitting there already. Apparently John recognized them. 

"Hercules! Oh my god! It's been so long!" exclaimed John. They embraced, and Alex got a better look at Hercules. He was tall and muscular, dark skinned and wearing wizarding robes. 

"Hey man! It's been so long! Hey, look who I found!" he gestured towards the other kid. 

"Well, if it isn't Aaron Burr, sir!" John laughed. "The prodigy of Princeton Elementary! Alex, this is Burr, Burr this is Alex."

Aaron eyed him suspiciously. It was as if he had a problem of being introduced to new people.

"Hi, Aaron. I am Alexander Hamilton, at your service." He tried his best mimicking John's curtsey while sitting down. Alexander made it a personal goal of his to make Aaron Burr befriend him.

"Hello," said Aaron. He pulled out a book. "Please leave me alone."

Oh, this was going to be difficult. Alex turned his attention toward the other boy. 

"Nice to meet you, too," he said. Hercules looked like he wanted to laugh. "What?"

"You are naturally talented at annoying Burr. You are joining our squad, man," he said. 

"Isn't he the best," John beamed. "Hey, you've seen Laf anywhere?"

"Na, I think he's transferring from Beaux to here though. How does that even work?"

"Beauxbatons Academy?"

"Yeah," replied John. "How do you know about that and not know how to get onto the platform?"

"I just did some light reading."

Hercules scoffed. "Work outside of school? Man, you crazy." 

_Excuse me?_

"Well, I'm  _sorry,_ that I was grew up  _not knowing anything about magic._ I'm sorry that I  _want_ to learn about the wizarding world-"

He felt a hand on his arm. John's hand.

"Dude, calm down. You don't always have to say what you believe," he chided him.

"I second that," said Aaron. The second time that he spoke that day.

Alexander felt foolish. He was about to apologize as he heard knocking on their compartment door. It was three girls. He rose up to open the door. 

"Hello? Can we join you guys? All of the other compartments are either full, or filled with the annoying kids," one of the girls spoke. She was very pretty, with curly hair. She was standing in front of the two other girls, almost as if she was shielding them. 

Aaron's head popped up from his book as soon as he heard her voice. 

"Angelica Schuyler?" he asked incredulously. Alexander couldn't see what the big deal was, but John and Hercules looked a bit surprised as well. 

"Yes, I am Angelica. This is my sister, Eliza, and my other sister, Peggy. Now can we go in your compartment the sycophants are gonna get to us."

"Yeah, sure, come in!" said John. The atmosphere of the compartment shifted, as if everyone was trying their best to impress the Schuyler sisters. Burr was especially unctuous. 

"So, what brings you here, Angelica Schuyler?" he asked her. 

"You say my name like it is a title. Stop," she said. They just met, and Angelica was already done with his shit. 

"Well, it is, considering your father is the Minister of Magic. Say, maybe one day, when we grow up, we share a name as well." 

"You disgust me," said Angelica. One of her sisters giggled. John and Hercules just watched what went down like a movie.

"Oh, so you've discussed me? I'm a trust fund, you can trust me." Too far, Aaron, too far. 

" _Excuse me?_ I, for one, need you, pompous Princeton kid, to fuck off and never come back again. You know why I came into this compartment? To get away from little shits like you. The kids asking for my  _hand in marriage,_ to get my name. AS IF!" 

Wow. Angelica could bring down the house. Aaron left, but he winked to her on the way out, undeterred. 

"I'm sorry about that," she said. "It's just that he thinks he is the smartest in the room. Which is wrong, because I probably am-" One of her sisters punched her playfully in the arm. "Hey! 'Liza! I just saved your sorry ass from that fiend, and this is how you repay me-" She cut off. Probably remembered that she was in a compartment with 3 other strangers. 

"Hello?" asked John. "Nice to meet you?" John was brave. Talking to them first. It was like he didn't even notice the fact that the girls were  _extremely cute._

"Hi," said all of them at once. It was like they were one mind. 

"Hi," said John. Alexander and Hercules said nothing. John sighed. "Honestly, we have three more hours, y'all are making this awkward."

And so they talked. Alexander learned how the Schuyler sister's father was the Minister of Magic. He learned what the Minister of Magic actually was. He learned how Angelica probably was the smartest in the room, he learned how Eliza was sweet and kind and loyal, he learned how fun and innocent Peggy was. He also learned more about his male companions. He learned how John's father ran a slave trade for house elves, and how he hated it and wanted to form an organization that would free house elves (S.P.E.W., he would call it, for Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare). He learned how Hercules's parents ran Twilfitt and Tatting's, a store that sold robes. He learned how Hercules enjoyed making robes for the wealthy, but he wanted to work with the Aurors, perhaps spy on the enemy. And then he learned stranger things. (And then he learned the stranger things, like how Hercules said he would totally have intercourse with the Schuyler sister's mother, or their horse. A bit strange, but Alexander wasn't going to kinkshame.)

And the time went by, until at last, they had made it to Hogwarts.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> still dont know what to do about this 10 years old but they met their true love thing


	4. all the sorts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so this is the one where were sorting ham and friends  
> u dont know how long this took  
> how much internal debating  
> HAM'S IN THIS HOUSE  
> oh wait no  
> HAMS IN HERE  
> BUT GWASH WOULD DO WELL IN HERE  
> BUT OH NO IN HERE  
> BUT THIS HOUSE  
> and this is the point where people stop reading because ham and friends did not go into the houses they wanted them to be in

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i live in constant fear of spelling mcgonagall wrong  
> oh yea lets pretend that peggy and maria and laf and tjeff and herc and jmads dont look the same k thx

Hogwarts was magnificent. There was no other way to put it. Just  _magnificent._

It was seven stories high, supported by magic. There were towers and turrets everywhere which gave it a medieval feel. Even from a distance, you could see little acts of magic, levitating staircases or moving trees. 

Alexander knew all about Hogwarts. He had, after all, read  _Hogwarts: A History._ He, however, was not prepared for the actual thing. Most of his fellow first-years felt the same as they tried to catch a glimpse of it through the windows of the slowing down train.

 _Most._ Alexander heard side remarks this from one boy, the one with the poofy hair he saw boarding the train. 

"Hogwarts," he said scornfully. "Monticello looks better than this old dump."

 You were the one to judge how Hogwarts looked when you're wearing bright pink robes?  _This bitch._

"Actually," he started. "Hogwarts-" He was cut off when he heard a voice.

"First years! First years, follow me," he heard it say. Alexander and his friends left their compartment to see a guy directing them off of the train. "This way, this way, don't worry about your trunks, just follow me."

Once they were out of the train, they were sent across a lake on self-paddling canoes. They were led into a hall, where Headmistress McGonagall was waiting.

"Thank you, Prefect Washington," she said. "Now, we are about to begin the sorting ceremony. If you have read  _Hogwarts: A History,_ like you were supposed to-"

Alexander elbowed John. "Ha, told you so," he said teasingly. John rolled his eyes.

"You would know about the Houses of Hogwarts," McGonagall continued. "Now, follow me." 

She led them into a dining hall. There were four tables, each full of students. At the end of the hall there was a long table where the instructors sat. In front of the teacher's table, there was a stool, and on it sat a tattered old hat. When McGonagall and the first years reached the hat, it began to sing. 

 _Oh you may not think I'm pretty,_  
_But don't judge on what you see,_  
_I'll eat myself if you can find_  
_A smarter hat than me._  
  
_You can keep your bowlers black,_  
_Your top hats sleek and tall,_  
_For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat_  
_And I can cap them all._  
  
_There's nothing hidden in your head_  
_The Sorting Hat can't see,_  
_So try me on and I will tell you_  
_Where you ought to be._  
  
_You might belong in Gryffindor,_  
_Where dwell the brave at heart,_  
_Their daring, nerve, and chivalry_  
_Set Gryffindors apart;_  
  
_You might belong in Hufflepuff,_  
_Where they are just and loyal,_  
_Those patient Hufflepuffs are true_  
_And unafraid of toil;_  
  
_Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,_  
_if you've a ready mind,_  
_Where those of wit and learning,_  
_Will always find their kind;_  
  
_Or perhaps in Slytherin_  
_You'll make your real friends,_  
_Those cunning folks use any means_  
_To achieve their ends._  
  
_So put me on! Don't be afraid!_  
_And don't get in a flap!_  
_You're in safe hands (though I have none)_  
_For I'm a Thinking Cap!_

"Now, we shall begin," said McGonagall. "When I call your name, come up here and the hat will sort you. Aaron Burr," she called out. 

Aaron made his way up to the stool. He looked so poised and prepared, that asshole. Alexander's anxiety was eating him alive. 

McGonagall placed the hat on his head. After a quick moment of consideration, the hat called out, "SLYTHERIN!"

Aaron made his way to the Slytherin table. Alexander heard rumors about Slytherin. He heard that they were the worst house, and were not to be trusted. 

"Next! Thomas Jefferson!" 

Oh, so that's what the kid's name was. The guy with the poofy hair and horrible pink robes made his way up to the table. The hat was placed on his head.

"Wow, an asshole this one," Alexander thought he heard the hat say. "Great hair though. Ok, RAVENCLAW!"

But he liked the Ravenclaw house.  

"Elizabeth Schuyler!" Oh, Eliza! Alexander hoped that they were in the same house. 

"HUFFLEPUFF," the hat screamed. Ok, friendships between houses was acceptable, right?

"Angelica Schuyler!"

"Oh, there's another. What there's three of you? Angelica, that's rude. Awesome. Wow. Damn, you got wit. RAVENCLAW," the hat yelled. This hat was just  _full_ of sass. 

"Peggy Schuyler!"

"Here we go," it said sarcastically. Alexander lowkey wanted to be this hat's friend. "Huh. Uh huh. RAVENCLAW."

Alexander saw Prefect Washington welcome Angelica and Peggy to the Ravenclaw table. Huh. Washington seemed more like a Gryffindor himself, but whatever, the hat knows best.

"James Madison!"

Oh, he saw this kid talking to Jefferson. He didn't know how he felt about this. 

"RAVENCLAW!"

Ok, maybe this kid wasn't a major asshole.

"Hercules Mulligan!"

 _Go Mulligan!,_ Alexander thought.  _You are one of my great friends and I will totally support you no matter what-_

"SLYTHERIN!"

Er. 

Alexander felt someone grasp his hand. John. Alex looked up into John's very freckled, very pretty face.

"I don't want to be in Slytherin," Alex whispered.

"Me neither," said John.

"It's ok, we'll be ok," he said. 

"Alexander Hamilton!"

The hat was placed on his head. 

"Oh, wow, you are a real piece of work," the hat said. "Not Hufflepuff, oh, you would do horribly in Hufflepuff. Ravenclaw? You are pretty smart- oh no you're pretty stupid sometimes. Aha! I got it. SLYTHER- Oh wait. Oh, no no no no no no. Yeah, uh huh, uh huh, GRYFFINDOR!"

 _Well that was an experience._ Alexander joined the Gryffindor table, and anxiously waited for John to be sorted.

"Maria Reynolds!" 

That's nice and all, but  _when was John going to be sorted?_

"SLYTHERIN!"

"John Laurens!"

_Fucking finally._

"Oh, I gotchu, HUFFLE-oh wait, oh wait huh, you wanna, you sure? Ok then, if you insist-GRYFFINDOR!"

_Thank god._

"Now, we have one more student to be sorted," said McGonagall.

"What does she mean," Alex whispered to John. "There's literally no one left."

"It's probably Laf, that dramatic little prick," John said. He rolled his eyes.

"He is a transfer student from Beauxbatons, and he was transferred here for his safety, as France is suffering from the wraths of You-Know-Who. Be kind, as he does not speak much French. Please welcome, Gilbert!"

At this moment, 2 thing happened at once. John and Hercules burst out laughing like there was no tomorrow, and the doors of the hall opened to the sound of trumpets and confetti. In strode a wizard, with great hair tied into a ponytail. The hall silenced and cleaned itself of confetti, but John and Hercules could not stop laughing.

Gilbert reached the Sorting Hat now. He looked unflustered, like he was used to all the attention. Like he was royalty. 

 It was placed on his head.

"Well, another rich, royal, privileged-oh you aren't horrible. Actually, I quite like you. So, Hufflepuff? Actually you would do well in Ravenclaw. Actually , oh this is hard. But oh, you did that. That's really reckless man, get your shit together. Ok, now then, GRYFFINDOR!" the hat yelled.

Such a short ceremony for such an elaborate entrance.

He made his way to Alexander's table and sat next to John and him. 

"Gilbert," John said in a way of greeting. He was still laughing.

"Hey man you shut your mouth right now or I shove it up your sorry ass-"

"What's so funny?" interrupted Alex. I mean, Gilbert didn't do anything yet. 

"Gilbert," replied John. Oh yes, because  _that_ explains it all.

"Yes, Gilbert, and if you ever refer to me like that again I will rip out your throats and-"

"Harsh," said Alex. It was just a name.

"You can understand me?" he asked. What kind of question was  _that?_

"Yes, I can understand you, you are speaking English, aren't you?" Alex said sarcastically. 

"Well, no," said John. "We're speaking French. How would you know how to speak French?"

"I don't?" Alex was confused.

"Actually, some people are born fluent in every language. Kinda like some kids are born speaking Parseltounge, or born gifted and talented and beautiful like  _me,"_ said Gilbert. "And call me Lafayette, or you will never see the living day again."

"Wow, where'd you learn all that," muttered John.

"Beaux. We start a month ahead, so I'm already so much smarter than all you lot," Lafayette said. Alexander laughed.  _As if._

"You know what," said Lafayette. "Since you're already fluent in talking shit, I mean French, you can join me in my  _elite circles."_

"What you don't have a name for them?"

"Actually, we do, but we don't tell people cause that's so pretentious," said John. He leaned in close. "Revolutionary Crew," he whispered.

 _Damn right that was fucking pretentious._ Alexander loved it already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now i understand that you're all like ALEXANDER HAMILTON BELONGS IN SLYTHERIN yeah yeah but slytherins have a sense of self preservation ham DOES NOT ok


	5. doing actual work at school

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they take classes and cute fun banter and adorable ness?  
> oh, and I went in and made changes so mcgonagall is headmistress nothing major dont read my entire work again its too cringeworthy  
> this chapter is really bad whoops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lets pretend that half of what laf says is french cause im too lazy to use google translate and i bet u are too  
> oh yeah laf's nonbinary forgot to mention that  
> let's just say that laf mentioned it sometime between this chapter and last chapter im too lazy to write it  
> also forgot to mention that schuyler sisters are triplets that look nothing alike

Alexander never slept better. A full meal, surrounded by friends. Alexander felt at home. 

Of course, his sleep had to be interrupted by the thing he actually came to Hogwarts for. Education.

"Alexander, wake up, you're going to miss the food." John was shaking him awake. 

"Food?" He stirred awake. He opened his eyes and they met with John's eyes. Pretty.

"Yes, food, now come on we'll be late," Lafayette said from they bed. They was already dressed and ready to go. 

"Dressed to impress, I see," said Alex. "What, some special lady you met in your short time here?"

"Yes, actually. That Angelica Schuyler, very pretty, maybe I can flirt my way into her graces?"

John and Alex laughed. 

* * *

 

The trio made their way to the Great Hall. They met with the Schuyler Sisters and Hercules. Apparently, the students were supposed to sit with their house, but John was having none of that.

"Segregation," he said scathingly. "Is one of the stupidest things I ever heard. Who cares what they say, I want to sit with my friends."

They found a spot, at the end of the Gryffindor table. They ate their breakfast, talked, and compared schedules. Lafayette complained about the bread.

"Ew, this toast. Back in France, we have the best, flaky, warm baguettes," they said.

"I bet you sure did have fun shoving those baguettes up your ass," retorted Alex. They laughed.

"Oh, so witty and original of you, Alexander! Telling someone to shove something up their ass! Never heard it before," Angelica said. Oh, Angelica. Sarcastic, witty, pretty, and savage  _as fuck._

"I can see why you're not in Hufflepuff," said Eliza. 

It was a shame that they weren't all in the same classes. Alexander had the same classes with John and Lafayette (obviously, they were in the same house). He had Herbology with the Hufflepuffs, flying and potions with Hercules, and Defense Against the Dark Arts and Astronomy with the Ravenclaws. Transfiguration, History of Magic, and Charms he had with his own house. 

While they were talking, Thomas Jefferson walked by, accompanied with Aaron Burr and James Madison.  _Burr? Hanging out with Jefferson?_ Honestly, Alex was disappointed. 

"What  _the hell_ are you guys doing sitting together? You know you're supposed to sit with your own house," Jefferson said. "Honestly, no respect for your house," he muttered.  _Asshole._

"I will fight you!" said Alexander. There are millions, no  _trillions_ of nerves in the human body and some people have the ability to just  _get on every single one of them._

"Hold on, Hold on!" Someone yelled. Prefect Washington. "Jefferson, back off. Go to your own table!"

"Oh, shit that's my table," Alex thought he heard Washington mutter. "You're going to lose points for our house, or I  _thought you had respect for your own house."_  

"Who is  _that,"_ Lafayette said appreciatively. 

"Some prefect," said John. 

"What the hell is a prefect," asked Lafayette. 

"They basically babysit us. Kinda like a mom or dad friend," said Angelica.

"I would love to have him call me daddy," said Lafayette.

John choked on his pumpkin juice.

 

* * *

 

**Monday**

 

 First, they had Charms, taught by Professor Filius Flitwick. He was very nice, and tolerant of Alexander and his friend's 'nanigans. While they were there, John and Alex got time to tease Lafayette about virtually everything.

"So, how did your escapades with Angelica go," John asked Lafayette once, while Flitwick was teaching them about Levitation. 

"It's no hope! You didn't warn me," said Lafayette. "Why didn't you guys warn me?"

"We thought it would be funny," said Alex.

 

When they were practicing the levitation charm, Lafayette levitated Alex's books to hit them on the head.

 

 

Next, they had History of Magic. Eternally boring.

Alexander tried his best to listen to pay attention, but John kept passing notes to Alexander. 

"You-Know-Who was the supreme monarch of the wizarding world......."

 _This is so boring, Alex,_ the note read. Alexander loved the way John signed his name.

"As you should know, the Ministry of Magic broke off from You-Know-Who's reign......"

 _Yeah, but I should probably pay attention. I want to have a future, you know?_ Alex wrote back. He did need to do well in school, he didn't have any rich family members to depend on.

"In the Battle of Yorktown, the last major battle between You-Know-Who and the Ministry of Magic......"

 _Come on Alex! You're probably going to ace this! Let me tell you about quidditch or something,_ John's note said.

"You-Know-Who is not dead, and his whereabouts are unknown. Some may speculate that he....."

 _Okay then,_ Alex replied. He couldn't say no to John. Never. He was helpless.

 

 

They had lunch with the Revolutionary Crew (Lafayette invited the Schuyler sisters into their group, and they agreed). 

McGonagall made an announcement. "The Third Floor is off limits, unless you want to die a horrible and painful death."

"You should go there sometime," said Angelica. 

"If I'm going, I'm dragging your sisters with me."

 _No hope,_ Lafayette mouthed from across the table.

"You know what I don't understand," said Lafayette one time. "How you and John, and Peggy and Herc became virtually attacked at the hip. I mean, I've known John longer than you, and he's never looked at me like that!"

John blushed. "Peggy and Herc?" he asked.

"Yes, Peggy and Herc," they said. "Quick to take the attention off of you, huh? No, but Peggy and Herc have been sneaking around, finding secrets, just ruining people's lives in all."

"Ruining people's lives? I'm kinda proud of them," said Angelica.

 

 

 Next, they had Transfiguration, taught by Professor McGonagall.

"I thought she was supposed to do Headmistress stuff," said Alex. 

"I think she keeps teaching Transfig cause she likes doing that," said John. "And then when she's really busy with Headmistress stuff, someone else will step in."

That class they learned about the Transfiguration alphabet. It was also the first class Alexander got in trouble for.

"Five points from Gryffindor for speaking out of turn and being disrespectful."

"But I didn't even-"

"Mr. Hamilton." 

"Yes, maam."

 

Lafayette clapped him on the back during passing period. "Good job with that, I'm surprised that it took so long for you to get in trouble."

"You are the worst."

 

 

 

Defense Against the Dark Arts! Sounds fun right? It's like learning to kill people, but simultaneously learning how to not be killed. Well, you would be able to learn those things if you had a competent teacher.

Unfortunately, Alexander and his friends did not.

The class was taught by a Charles Lee.

 _Arrogant, anti-charismatic, basically a national_ _embarrassment Charles Lee,_ Alexander thought. Charles Lee was horrible at his job. He was obsessed with himself,  _maybe even more than Lafayette,_ and thought he was so good at what he did. He wasn't. 

10 minutes in, and Alexander was sick of it.

"Excuse me," he said, raising his hand. "When are you going to stop  _praising yourself,_ and maybe teach us? About Defense Against the Dark Arts? Or are you so incompetent that you don't know how to do that, either?"

"Alexander," Angelica murmured warningly. But she was in Ravenclaw? Didn't her house want to learn about stuff, not deal with Lee's praises.

"I'm sorry,  _first year,_ " Lee spit out. "But I'll have you know that I have received the Order of Merlin award, the Third Class award, the ........."

He droned on and on. Alexander was outlining his side of the debate in his head, when he felt a hand on his arm. 

"Alexander," John said. "Not now. I know that he's a polymath, a massive pain in the ass, but don't get in trouble for something so stupid like this."

 

Alexander emerged from that class relatively unscathed, with losing only a few (50) house points.

 

 

 

**Tuesday**

 

Alexander woke up in time for the mail. It was quite magnificent, with owls flying everywhere dropping packages off to students. Alexander actually got a package. It contained a silvery, shimmery cloak.

"Oh, that's an invisibility cloak!" said Angelica when she first saw it. Peggy and Hercules stared at it with their mouths open. They started whispering to each other frantically. Lord knows what they were talking about.

"That's nice, but who the fuck sent it to me," said Alexander. He didn't have any relatives other than his mother, brother and his mom was too poor- oh, it was from his mother.

"From your mother and friends on St. Croix," Alexander read from a note. "I found this when looking through your father's things. I assumed it was magical so I sent it to you. Love from me and Philip. Don't forgot to write."

"That's pretty awesome," noted John.

"Yeah."

 

 

They had Charms first, again.

Next, they had Herbology with the Hufflepuffs. It was taught by a Neville Longbottom. A bit clumsy, but endearing nonetheless. 

That class was very hands on, and they worked repotting some plants. While they worked, Eliza, John, Lafayette, and Alex discussed uses for the invisibility cloak. 

"You could use it to spy on the girls in the bathroom," Alexander said. John looked dejected at this, Lafayette laughed, and Eliza swatted his arm.

"You can be such a fuckboy sometimes," she said. "Use it for what you love a lot, maybe even more than John. Use it to sneak into the restricted section in the library."

"Eliza, we've known you for what? 2 days now, and we've been such a bad influence on you," said John.

"I didn't learn to kick ass from you, I learned it from my sister," she said affectionately.

Of course.

 

Herbology was pretty good. Alex managed to win some points for Gryffindor by being an absolute know-it-all.

"Can any of you tell me what a mandrake is?" Professor Longbottom said once.

Cue the 20 minute lecture about mandrakes, courtesy of Alexander Hamilton.

Professor Longbottom looked a bit taken back by this, but then, "You remind me of a friend of mine. Ten points to Gryffindor."

 _It was nice to not be completely hated by a teacher for once,_ Alexander thought.

 

 Lunch. The usual. They discussed Quidditch tryouts.

"There are a lot of spots open on the teams," said Angelica. "They had to let first years try out. Try outs are next week."

 

 

Transfiguration. The usual. Gryffindor actually gained points. Because Lafayette already learned the material in Beauxbatons.

"Oh, where would you be without me?" he said dramatically at the end of class.

Fucking drama queen.

 

DADA, horrible as usual. Alexander didn't lose as many points as last time (he lost 45). He figured that he should just zone out during class, and pass by just cramming from textbooks.

"20 points from Gryffindor for not paying attention!"

Yeah.

 

**Wednesday**

 

Wednesday was basically the same as Tuesday, but with Astronomy at midnight.

"I'm so fucking tired," John said at one point. He looked over to Alex. Alexander looked fine, like he was fully rested and could go another 2 days. "How are you- how are you-"

"So awake?" Alex said.

"Yeah, that...."

"I'm used to not sleeping."

"Well, I'm not. Mind if I sleep and copy everything from you later?"

"Na, go ahead."  


They spent the rest of the class curled up next to each other.

 

 

**Thursday**

 

Another day like Tuesday, except they had flying with the Slytherins. John was perfect at flying (of course).

"How did you do so well on your first try?" Alex asked him.

"Back in South Carolina, we used to fly around all the time," John said.

"Cheater."

 

Lafayette was also amazing.

"Back in France-"

"Lafayette, you must understand that NO ONE GIVES A FUCK ABOUT WHAT YOU DID IN FRANCE," Hercules yelled. 

"You love me," Lafayette said sweetly.

"I will regret the day we met for the rest of my days-"

"You love me."

 

 

"You know how to speak French," Jefferson asked Lafayette at one point.

"Yeah, he's fluent in French like YOU ARE FLUENT IN TALKING SHIT JEFFERSON."

"Alexander, calm down."

 

 

Alexander was passable with his flying skills. Even that was a bit of an exaggeration.

"Dude, you are shit at flying," Hercules said one time. It wasn't fair. Almost all of his friends were amazing at it and he  _was_ shit at flying. 

"I hate you."

"You love me."

"I hate you."

 

**Friday**

 

They had Potions with the Slytherins first. It was taught by Professor Samuel Seabury. Seabury was the most incompetent, uneducated, little piece of shit Alexander had ever met. It was a double block, too. Double the pain.

So, Alexander did what he did best. Contradict Seabury's every move, threaten to fight him, and start a completely irrelevant class discussion that took up the better part of the period.

"Mr. Hamilton, if you know so much about Potion, why don't you teach this class," Seabury said mockingly.

Alexander stood up and made his way to the front of the class. "I was wondering when you were going to say that. So, I'll talk about bezoars today. Bezoars are-"

"Mr. Hamilton, go back to your seat."

"Are you sure, I mean I can probably get this lecture through and maybe start on aconite-"

"SIT DOWN!"

 

Gryffindor lost all of their House Points by the end of that class.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 "We made it through the week!" John said, as they were going to bed.

"Fuck you talking about, I already got like 5 detentions from Seabury and lost almost all of our house points one time," Alex replied.

"Shut up and go to sleep. I need my beauty sleep. And you guys, you guys really need your beauty sleep," said Lafayette.

John and Alex threw a pillow at them. 

"SORRY TO BRUISE YOUR OH-SO-PERFECT FACE, GLIBERT."

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this took me so long to write cause i had to work out a schedule for these nerds while being accurate to the books  
> and the formatting and that montage about school and ugh  
> and the fact that i am so fucking lazy  
> im sorry this chapter was horrible  
> hopeurehappy


	6. quidditch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> quidditch tryouts  
> quidditch game  
> ya get the gist of it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this also took me forever to write  
> is angelica playing this spot?  
> NO NO ANGELICA WILL DO GREAT HRE  
> WHAT IF ANGELICA DOESN'T PLAY AT ALL  
> same sorting hat conundrum  
> REMINDER THAT THESE KIDS ARE LIKE NOT TEN THEYRE LIKE IDK STILL HAVENT GOTTEN AROUND THAT

One week later, Alexander and his friends were faced with Quidditch.

Alex knew the basics of it. There was a ball. And then another one. And then a smaller one? 

"You are hopeless at quidditch," Peggy teased.

"And you're any better?" Alexander asked. 

"At least I can ride a broom," she said.

"Who told you about that?" Alexander's failures at flying lessons was strictly confidential, he told his friends that. 

"Hercules. A secret for a kiss."

 _Typical Slytherin behavior. They would sell you out for a donut,_ Alexander grumbled in his mind.

"Wait. A kiss?"

"Yes, we're dating, and no, you can't blackmail me with that information because I already told Angelica. Ha."

 

 

 

So Alexander, not trying out for Quidditch. Everyone else in the Revolutionary Crew, excluding Eliza and Alex, were. 

Washington, one of the Ravenclaw Prefects, joined the Crew as well. He looked at them (Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws, Gryffindors, and Slytherins all sitting together happily) and was curious and sat down next to Lafayette and befriended them. (Alexander and John suspected that he just sat there because of Lafayette, but they weren't going to tell them that.)

"Please call me George," he said at one point, probably sick of Hercules referring to him as Washington.

"You want to be referred to the same name as You-Know-Who," Angelica asked skeptically.

"Er.... Fine ok, just call me Washington," he said.

Angelica had the talent to shut down men so well.

Washington was also the Ravenclaw Quidditch captain. 

"Just because I'm your friend, don't expect to get special treatment at tryouts," he said to Angelica and Peggy.

"You can look at us like you look at Jefferson, and we would still be on your team because we slay," Angelica retorted.

Cue high-five between Angelica and Peggy.

 

 

* * *

 

 The girls, did in fact slay. Alexander, Eliza, Lafayette, Hercules, and John went to the tryouts to support Peggy and Angelica.

There were two spots open, chaser and seeker. The rest were filled by men. Angelica was outraged when she saw this.

"Where are the females? WHERE ARE THE FEMALES?"

"Well, these guys were just better-" Washington started.

" 'Well suited?' " Angelica said, making quotation marks with her hand. " 'Well suited?' No wonder Slytherin won the Quidditch cup for the last 10 years!"

Angelica and Peggy didn't have much competition. The others barely knew how to fly. In the end, Angelica was appointed a chaser, and Peggy was a seeker.

Peggy made a wonderful seeker. Most people underestimated her, thinking that she was too weak or too young to catch the Snitch. Boy, they were proven wrong.

"Wow, you might be as good as Ginny Weasley," Washington remarked. Alexander wasn't sure who that was, but she must be really good at Quidditch.

Angelica made a brutal chaser. She was merciless, yelling out critique of the other players.

"OH, GET ON WITH IT, OR IS YOUR SEXIST MALE MIND GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOU GETTING THE QUAFFLE?" 

They were a force to be reckoned with.

 

 

Gryffindor tryouts. John and Lafayette were trying out. 

"There are going to be so many first years on the team," John said. "The older kids are going to be pissed."

Pissing people off? Alexander's specialty. 

Two spots open, yet again. Beaters. 

"So what does the beater do again?" Alexander asked. 

"Oh, they go in the line of mortal danger and beat off rouge iron balls," said Lafayette. "I mean, I don't have a will written yet, but I trust that you know me well enough to take care of my possessions well and give them to my significant other."

"Lafayette, from what we've heard, your significant other is yourself," John said.

"You wound me."

 

The Revolutionary Crew went to support the boys, as usual. 

"I can't wait for them to get on the team so that we can decimate them on the field," Angelica said. 

Quidditch. The game that ruined friendships.

Lafayette and John did amazingly. They knew what to do with the bat and which ball to hit, and they did better than Alexander could ever do. 

Alexander was just worried that they were going to get themselves killed. I mean, he knew that people haven't died because of quidditch in a long time, but he was still stressed out. Eliza could fell his anxiety, apparently.

She took his hand. She opened her mouth as to say something sweet and endearing. "Chill fam."

Hercules wouldn't stop laughing for 10 minutes.

 

 

Hufflepuff tryouts. Since their only fellow Hufflepuff was Eliza, and Eliza wasn't trying out, Hufflepuff tryouts were ignored by the Revolutionary Crew.

 

 

 

Slytherin tryouts. Hercules and a girl named Maria Reynolds were the only first years to try out. Hercules became the seeker, and Maria became the beater.  Their quidditch captain didn't look too happy about that. 

"Why does he look so bitter," Alex asked Angelica. 

"Slytherins. They hate change. They're the sexist, racist, homophobic ones- kinda like people in the South in America."

"Makes me happy that we're pissing him off."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

One month later was the first quidditch game. Ravenclaw vs. Hufflepuff. 

The Revolutionary crew was rooting for ravenclaw. Duh. Even Eliza, a Hufflepuff, was rooting for Ravenclaw.

"You're not rooting for Hufflepuff," Alex asked her.

"Blood before faction," she said. 

"We're part of houses."

"I know, but it sounds better that way."

 

 

 

It was a good game. Ravenclaw won ("Well, when you've got Angelica and Peggy on your side, of course you're going to win," Eliza said). Hufflepuffs didn't do too badly either ( "Hufflepuffs are a big fightsy for a house that is prided on their kindness" ). The Hufflepuff beaters kept sending bludgers toward the Washington and the boys on the team ( "SEXIST ASSHOLES," Angelica screamed at them). They soon realized that Angelica was a threat, and started sending bludgers toward her. No one noticed little Peggy, sneaking around looking for the Snitch. ( "Did you see that I TAUGHT HER THAT," Hercules screamed when she pulled off a particularly sneaky move. ) The Hufflepuffs were ahead in points because of their beaters ( John grudgingly admitted that those beaters were really good), but then Peggy pulled in and saved the day. (Alexander would have asked Lafayette's opinion on the game, but they had all eyes on Washington). 

 

"Angelica!" Alex said when he saw her after the game. 

"Alexander!"

"Congratulations."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, we won- I know- Of course we did. What did you expect? Anyways, you coming to the afterparty?"

"Afterparty?" 

"Yeah, you coming or what?"

"Shouldn't that be only for Ravenclaws?"

"It is for Ravenclaws and allies."

"Ok then."

"Great!! See ya."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

The afterparty was  _lit._ Well, there was no strong alcohol because Filch would have been on you faster than you could say quidditch, but ravenclaws knew how to party. 

The Revolutionary Crew (well, excluding Lafayette because no one knew _where the fuck_ they was) attended the party.  There was music (from the Weird Sisters, perhaps?) playing loudly from a disc. There was a table full of butterbeers, and Ravenclaw banners and flags everywhere. 

Despite being a party to celebrate the Ravenclaw quidditch team, nobody could find Washington. So instead, the Ravenclaws decided to hoist Peggy on their shoulders and carry her around (did they expect to hoist Washington on their shoulders if they could find them? Was it even possible to carry Washington). 

 

But alas, Alexander dragged the John back to his dorm. 

"I have school tomorrow," Alex said.

"You _fucking_ nerd," John said. "Ok then let's go."

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Alexander." John's voice cut through the night.

"What? It's the middle of the night," Alexander said. He stirred awake, sitting up. He looked over at John. He looked worried.

"Lafayette's not here."

"Really? What time is it?"

"Two," John said. "I mean, I know that they can take care of themself, but I'm really worried."

"Hey." Alex climbed out of his bed and into John's. "Don't be worried. You want to go and try and find him?" He took his hand.

"Yea, I mean I want to go and find him, but if I got in trouble and my dad found out....."

"Hey. I don't want you to worry. I've got my invisibility cloak. We can use that, we probably won't be found."

John bit his lip. "Ok, then," he nodded.

"Ok, you stay there, I'll grab my invisibility cloak. I don't want you to worry. 

We'll find him."

 

* * *

 

 

 

"Where would Laf be right now?" asked Alex. He held up a lamp.

"I don't know, maybe the Astronomy tower? I know that he likes being up there a lot," John said.

"Ok let's go up there." 

They were both huddled under the invisibility cloak. They started climbing up a staircase, when it started moving.

"What is going on?" Alexander whispered harshly.

"The staircases, they move, remember?'

Shit, shit, shit, they were completely  _fucked._

They were at the third floor now, the  _banned_ floor.

"Alexander, we're not allowed to go in there. Unless you want to die a painful and horrible death, remember?"

"Yea, I know I know, but what now. We just wait here for the stairs to move again?"

"I don't know. Wait, are you pacing? You can't just start fucking pacing while we're under an invisibility cloak-"

"Shhhhh."

"What- oh."

There was a cat right in front of where they were standing. Filch's cat. 

"Do you think it can see us," Alex asked.

"Probably. Demon cat."

Alexander grabbed John's hand. 

"Where are we going?"

"To a painful and horrible death."

"But-"

"Hey think about it: if we die, we'll be dead."

"That doesn't make me feel better."

They entered the room just as Filch appeared. The third floor was gloomy and dark, with spiderwebs everywhere.  

"Woah...." Alexander said. He took John's hand, and wandered around. There were statues and doors everywhere. 

"This is cool and all, but can we go now? I don't want my dad to find out about this...."

"Ok, fine." 

They exited through a door and closed the door behind them. Unfortunately for them, it was the wrong door.

"Alexander?"

"Yeah John? Just give me a sec, I need to make this door look like we've never been in there."

"Alexander."

"What?" He turned around, and saw what John saw. 

"I think we found our painful and horrible death."

It was a plant. A really weird plant, with three snapping bulbs. The bulbs had teeth, which looked pretty poisonous. What the actual fuck. It was like the venus fly trap in that muggle game, _Plant vs. Zombies._ One of the bulbs started snapping at them. Alexander was acting purely on instinct, his mind blank, but he thought one thing.  _Not. John._

"IMPEDIMENTA," he yelled, pointing the wand at the plant. He noticed that it was standing on something, like a trapdoor.

The plant was immobilized, and they ran for the door, and escaped the third floor. 

"John?" 

"Yeah?"

"Let's go back to the dorm."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Alexander couldn't sleep. His brain would not stop. He couldn't help but think things over.  _Where_ the fuck  _was Lafayette? Why_ the fuck  _was there a mutant human eating plant in Hogwarts? What the fuck was it doing? Was it guarding something?_ Alexander couldn't help but theorize. 

He heard tossing and turning from John's bed. He was probably having a nightmare. Alex couldn't blame him, the events of that night were brutal. 

"John?" he said. He went over to his bed and shook him awake. "John, wake up, you're having a nightmare."

"Oh my god. I was there, in the room, and you were there too, and you were being eaten by the plant...." he stuttered. 

"Shhhh. It's ok. You're safe." He pulled him in for a hug. "Oh, I should probably go to sleep...."

"Stay?" 

"Hey."

"Hey?"

"Ok."

 

 

They fell asleep in each others arms. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did anyone see that bey reference i sneaked in there? no? ok then  
> also why the fuck are my chapters getting so fucking long  
> and theyre getting worse and worse  
> eh whatever


	7. A Winter's(no its halloween but whatever) Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> andtheschuylersistersaretheenvyofallYOifyoucanmarryasisteryourerichsonisthataquestionofifburrofwhichone  
> so ze mystery of laf is revealed i dont think its much of a mystery i bet yall probs guessed what happened to laf im not that sneaky  
> and then stuff happens idk im making this up as i go along  
> this chapter is a mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i had this great idea for ze last chapter which i already posted because that's how my brain works. i hate u brain. anyways, the dogs is now some fancy plant venus flytrap man eating plant three headed plant because that happened. my brain is so annoying sometimes
> 
> i feel like my writing is getting choppier and choppier and choppier oops

Alexander woke up in John Laurens' arms.  _How the fuck...._ he thought. Then, the events of last night came back to him. 

Laf being missing.

Looking for him.

The mutant plant thing.

John having a nightmare.

Falling asleep in John's arm, which by the way, were super comfortable. Alex looked up to see John, sleeping peacefully. His freckles and hair stood out in the early sunlight, and Alexander had a strong urge to kiss him.  _Where the fuck did that come from,_ he thought. 

He must have disturbed John, because he rolled over. 

"Alexander," he muttered in his sleep.

_He's dreaming about me?_ Alexander felt almost giddy at the thought.  _Ok, this is getting awkward._

Alexander tried to climb over John, but failed miserably, tripping over him and sprawling onto the floor.

"Oh, shit!" he yelled. He landed on his ankle, which was now probably sprained.

"Alexander?" John said. He woke up. "What happened? Are you ok? What are you doing on the floor?"

"Nothing, I just...." Alex trailed off, as John stared blushing furiously.  _Is he remembering what happened after they saw the plant?_

"Hey, can we, er, just... forget what happened last night?" 

Oh. Alexander jut found out that he was probably falling in love with John Laurens. He had barely known for ten minutes, and his heart was already shattered. 

"Oh, ok then," he said. If that's what John wanted, he would forget it. He tried standing up, and fell over. "Fuck."

"Did you hurt yourself? Here, show me your ankle.  _Episkey._ "

"Thanks. Let's go get food."

 

* * *

 

 

They joined the Schuyler sisters and Hercules at the Great Hall. No sign of Lafayette. According to Angelica, she hadn't seen Washington after the quidditch match either. It was halfway through breakfast when they finally showed up. 

"LAFAYETTE, WHERE _THE FUCK_ WERE YOU?" Alex yelled, at the same time Angelica yelled, "WASHINGTON YOU FUCKING MISSED THE PARTY." They was walking with Washington at their side, looking weirdly happy despite waking up early for school. 

"Yeah, you asshole, we almost got ourselves killed because of you!" 

"Excuse me, you  _did what now?"_ Eliza said. 

"Students, students," McGonagall said, standing up from her table in the front and tapping a spoon to a glass.  _Such chaos,_ Alexander thought. "Now, as most of you know, we had a ball last year on Halloween. Now, back by popular demand, we shall have a Halloween Ball. Your teacher shall inform you more on this, but just know that we will have a ball." She sat down.

And the Revolutionary Crew all started talking at once. 

"We're going to have a ball?" Peggy said.

"You're coming with me, Peggy," Hercules said.

"You left your dorms in the middle of the night?" Eliza asked.

"What the fuck happened to you guys," Angelica asked to Lafayette and Washington. 

"Where the fuck were you?" John and Alex asked to Lafayette.

_Absolute chaos._

"Ok, everyone SHUT THE FUCK UP," Angelica said. "Now, yes, we're having a ball, we're not talking about that now. What we're talking about, is these bitches that didn't show up to the fucking afterparty." She sized them up.

"Crinkled robes, Lafayette what happened to your impeccable clothes, messed up hair, you didn't even comb it? Disappearing for the night at like the exact same time.... Oh. My. God."

"What? What is it," Alex said. Lafayette, apparently, did not want them to know. They gestured to tell her to cut it off. 

"You- you, you just-"

"What," John said. 

"They-"

"Angelica is too smart for her own good," Lafayette said. "I will tell you guys, it's only a matter of time."

"Laf, we almost got ourselves killed cause of you, we deserve to know," Alex butted in.

"Oh my god." Angelica took her head into her hands. "Alex, John, talk. Actually, no not Alex, just John, if we let Alex talk we'd probably die."

So John talked. He told them about their adventures under the invisibility cloak and finding the plant. Obviously, he omitted the 'falling asleep in each other's arms' part. Hey, Lafayette had their secrets, they had theirs.

John's voice was so sweet. It was warm and soothing, like a melody. Alexander could just listen to him for hours on hours on hours.

The entire time John was telling the story, Eliza looked like she didn't know whether to scream at them or hug them. Peggy and Hercules just looked in awe. Lafayette looked a bit sheepish, like he felt bad for it all. Angelica just looked like a bomb that was about to explode. 

"You've invented a new kind of stupid," she said once that was all over. "A damage you can never undo, kind of stupid. An open all the cages at the zoo, kind of stupid. Clearly, you didn't think that through, kind of stupid."

"I know, we're horrible people, I'm going to hell, let's just talk about trivial matters like the ball," John said. "You're making me feel bad."

 

 

* * *

 

 

The Gryffindors went to Charms. While they were there, Alexander and John finally got an answer from Lafayette about where they was that night.

"Let's just say that daddy and I had some matters to attend to,  _if you know what I mean."_

Oh.

Alexander would never be able to look at Lafayette or Washington the same way again. 

John looked like he wanted to laugh or throw up.

John, oh John. Alex and John's relationship became more normal during breakfast, but Alexander couldn't help but want to make out on John's face a lot. He didn't tell John. Of course he didn't tell John. He didn't want to lose him as a friend. 

 

 

 

Once charms was over, they met with Eliza and headed to herbology. They talked, and Eliza basically mothered them and gave them a Molly Weasley type speech.

"John. Alex.  _What. an. idiot."_ She then proceeded, scolding them for leaving their dorms at night, for entering the third floor, for nearly getting themselves killed for nothing.

"We didn't get ourselves killed for nothing," Alex protested. "We learned that there was a plant on top of a trapdoor on the third floor!"

"Well-" Eliza started, but was cut off by Professor Longbottom.

"Oh, have you guys discovered Leafy?"

"Leafy?" Alex asked. The killer plant had a  _name?_

"Yeah! Leafy, in the third floor. You know, she guards Nicholas Flamel's thing- I've said too much."

"What?"

"Forget everything I've said ever."

"Uh, ok?"

Strange. Alexander's brain got to work. He like working. It made him feel productive, like he was contributing to society. It was also distancing him from his emotions, where thoughts of John circulated his brain.

So he started to theorize.  _Who is Nicholas Flamel? What was that killer mutant plant- or_ Leafy-  _there for?_ Alexander knew he had to research more about it. He needed answers.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

"Apparently, we're supposed to find a date for the ball," Eliza said.  _Great. Because he needed another complication in his love life._

"I bet Laf and Washington don't have to worry about that," Peggy joked. 

"I bet you and Herc don't have to worry about that either," Angelica said. Peggy rolled her eyes. "So," Angelica continued. "Who are you taking?"

"I don't know," Alex said. He glanced over at John. "This was kind of thrown on us, wasn't it?"

"Well, you've got like a week," Angelica said. "And I already know who I want to take." Yeah, so did Alex. 

"Who?" John asked. 

"Well," she said, learning in closer. "Maria Reynolds."

"Who?" John repeated. Alex nodded along. He had no idea who this Maria Reynolds was. 

"Oh my god, you ignorant sluts-" 

"Thank you," Alex muttered.

"That's Maria. Over there." She subtly pointed to a girl sitting at the Slytherin table. 

"You didn't tell me about her," Eliza said, with her arms crossed. 

" 'Liza, I just chose her today when I overheard her talking shit about males with her friends."

"Chose? Angelica, you don't just choose who you fall in love with," John said.

"That's deep," Alex said.  

"Thanks. Well, I guess we'd better find a date so that we don't make ourselves look like complete fools."

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Seven Days Before the Ball**

 

"She said yes! She said yes!" Angelica said happily, joining the crew at their lunch spot. "Maria said yes!"

"Good for you," John said bitterly. Angelica must have noticed his tone of voice, because she responded, "You didn't get a date yet, did you?"

He shook his head. "Alex?" He shook his head. "Eliza?" She shook her head. "I'm disappointed in all of you."

"Hey-" John protested, but Angelica was having none of that.

"Look, all you have to do is go up to someone and ask them to go with you." 

"Easy for you to say," Alex muttered.

"Yeah, but they could be taken, or say no, and like everyone has a date by now-" John said.

"I know someone who doesn't have a date," Eliza said.

John squirmed uncomfortably. "Yeah?"

"Martha Manning. She's this girl in my house. I always hear her complain about how she doesn't have a date to the ball. You oughtta give her a try."

"I guess."

 

**Five Days**

 

"So I asked her out," John said at lunch. "And she said yes."

"Good for you, man," Hercules said. He then went back to making out with Peggy.  _Lovesick assholes,_ Alex thought affectionately. At least Laf and Washington weren't that affectionate. They do go missing a lot though. Alexander would rather not think about what they did when they were gone.

 

 

**Two Days**

 

Alexander was at the library. He was always at the library, only this week it was a lot more than usual.

He was avoiding John. He knew that. John just got himself a date (girlfriend?). Alex felt pretty bitter about this, since he did want to make out on John's face a lot. So, he, being the asshole that he was, put all his energy into researching Nicholas Flamel and avoiding his emotions generally. If he worked non-stop and kept his mind occupied at all times he wouldn't fall into the bottomless pit of John Laurens. 

 

 

John knew that Alex was avoiding him. Alexander dumped twice as much work on him than usual, and almost spent all of his free time at the library. He noticed. Of course he noticed. He knew Alexander like he knew his own mind.

John didn't know whether to be sad or relieved. Relieved that there wasn't a scandal waiting to happen, a scandal that his father would disown him for. Sad that Alexander Hamilton, his best friend, no, more than just a friend to John, was avoiding him. 

The worst part was, John wasn't even sure why Alexander was avoiding him. Yes, he did know Alex extremely well, but Alexander's mind was like a labyrinth- complicated, complex, almost impossible to decipher. Was Alex avoiding him because of Martha? John agreed to ask Martha out completely because of peer pressure. Otherwise, he would have had no interest in girls, whatsoever. Did Alex find out about how John was completely in love with him? He only told two people- Eliza and Lafayette- he felt that those two would keep his secret well. Did he notice how John always stole glances while he wasn't looking, how he hung on to Alexander's every word, like Alex was singing a song for him, how he would look at him during the rare times Alex slept? 

John didn't know what to do. He was losing his best friend.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why am i making so many beyonce references im not even obsessed with her  
> i had to back a couple of chapters to get the facts straight i don't even know my own fic  
> i just realized that the first quidditch match comes after halloween. UGH INACCURACIES WHATEVER JUST DEAL WITH IT  
> i make a bunch of references to a bunch of tumblr posts whoops  
> this also took a while to write because i would think of lams moments while writing this and want to go and read lams stuff  
> why the fuck are my chapters so long now
> 
> i just thought of something  
> house elves are basically slaves in this  
> and u know about jefferson's affair with sally hemmings  
> affair bitch please he raped her  
> anyways  
> jefferson in this raped a house elf??????????  
> yea gonnna have to work out the kinks in that


	8. Ze' Actual Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i started writing from john's pov and now i cant stop  
> and now i want to write from elizas pov and alexs pov for the same part at the same time ugh  
> ill write one and if someone wants me to write it flipped ill do that  
> and there are like 100 dif scenarios for this ball and all of them are fab and uggggggghhhh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cant believe im writing angst and pining i have a love hate relationship with angst  
> this chapter looked better in my head  
> i feel like peggy and herc would be the april and andy couple of them all  
> from parks and rec  
> there are going to be lots of parks and rec references in this cause cur non

**The Day of the Ball**

 

"Oh, look who fucking finally showed up to lunch," Angelica greeted Alex. "Where the fuck were you all those times?"

"Library," was Alex's one worded reply. He was just standing there, swaying. 

"Alexander," Eliza said. "You look like you're about to collapse. When was the last time you ate?"

"Er...... I grabbed a snack? From the kitchens? Oh, which by the way are full of house elves John you need to get on that."

"So, you barely ate in the last three days. How much did you sleep?"

"7 hours."

"Alexander don't lie to me."

"7 hours Total."

"You idiot," John said. He stood up, and pulled Alex into a seat, and arranged him so that Alex was leaning on him.  _Hey,_ John thought,  _if I can't have him, might as well._ "What were you even doing in the library? We don't have that much homework-Oh shit do we?"

"No," Alex said. He nuzzled into John's side.  _Oh, fuck,_ John thought.  _He was warm and flirting? But no, Alex flirts with everyone. But what if?_ And his brain went on and on and on. "I was researching Nicholas Flamel."

"Oh, that guy who Longbottom was talking about," Eliza said. "Had something to do with the killer plant?"

"Yeah," Alex said. "Didn't find anything, though."

"I know about Nicolas Flamel," Angelica said.  _Of course she fucking did,_ Alex thought. "Something about a philosopher's stone?"

Alexander started rising from his spot. "I have to go-"

"Where are you going?" John shouted after him. He was being ridiculous, he barely ate in the last what? 3 days? He barely slept, he was on the verge of a breakdown and yet he was already at the doorway of the Great Hall.

"God dammit," John said, running after him. 

"You go knock some sense into him," Angelica yelled. 

John rounded the corner. "Alex!," he yelled. He reached him, and grabbed his arms. "Where are you going?"

"Library." That fucking one worded reply again. 

"Alexander you've barely eaten, you've barely slept, you are going to work yourself to death." John was all up in Alexander's face now, their foreheads almost touching.

"Eh," he said. "Death is inevitable, you know. Might as well do it now and get it over with. Actually, I know a couple spells that might-"

" _Stop._ Alexander, stop. I don't understand you right now. I mean, I know that you have anxiety, but why are you being so suicidal right now? And why  _the fuck_ have you been avoiding me? Did I do something wrong? Was that one night too much?"

"No, John Laurens, you have never done anything wrong in your life. It's just that I," he squirmed, shifting his weight. He looked so uncomfortable. "It's just that I- I," he stammered. Alexander always had an eloquence with words, what was happening? "Nevermind. I have to leave." He turned and headed toward the library, leaving John standing there, helpless.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

"Did you find him?" Angelica asked, when John returned to the lunch table. 

 "Yeah," he said dejectedly. He sat down and put his head into his hanHeds. "He's going to the library, and he is going to work himself to death, and I can't go get him cause he's avoiding me, and I fucked up so bad," he rambled miserably. 

"Hey," Eliza said, laying a hand on his arm. "I'll go get him, and fix him. Don't worry about it." She gathered some food to take to Alexander. "See you next class."

 

* * *

 

 

Alexander fucked up so bad. He had his chance to tell John how he fell for him so badly, and what does he do? Fuck up. 

Alexander wandered to his favorite spot in the library. He proceeded to find anything relating to the philosopher's stone to distract him from his thoughts, but it wasn't working. He tried to not think about how John's face fell when Alex ran away from him, or how John's face lit up when he saw him at lunch, or how he was so warm and opening and welcome to Alex during lunch. 

Of course he fucking thinks about these things.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Eliza wandered around the library, looking for Alexander. She liked to think that she knew him pretty well, not as well as John knew him, though. So she just started looking for Hamilton™ Hiding Spots in the library. 

She had some trouble getting in there in the first place. "No food," the librarian whispered harshly at her. Eliza then explained how this food could bet rid of Alexander, who was basically in the library 24/7. The librarian let her through.

 

 

 

She found Alexander curled up on a couch in the Legal Section. She let out a breath she didn't know she was holding.

He was crying. 

"Oh, Alexander," she said. She set down her tray of food. "What's wrong?" 

She went over and comforted him.

"Nothing," he said, hiccuping. "It's just that I, I-"

"You can trust me," Eliza said, running a hand down his back soothingly. "I won't tell anyone. Is it about John?"

"How do you know about-"

"I've seen the way you two look at each other. And then, you completely avoid him. I could tell you guys were having relationship issues."

"I have so many issues. So, so many." He broke down.

"Shhh. Alexander, it's ok. You guys will be ok. Here, eat this and talk to me."

He took the food, and started rambling. "Ok, I have it bad for John. So bad, so fucking bad. It's just that his hair and his eyes and his fucking freckles,  _his fucking freckles, Eliza,_ and his fucking smile and his personality and I fucking oh my god fuck. And-"

"Hold on," Eliza interrupted. She was going to have to stop him at some point, Alex could probably talk for  _hours_ about John. "When did you start falling in love with him?"

"The night of Leafy."

"Yeah, tell me about that."

"So, we went back to our dorm and then John was having a nightmare- because that's what you do when you encounter a killer plant. And then I go and try and comfort him, because John only deserves happiness and love, and then he wanted me to stay because you know, nightmare. And then I fell asleep in his arms and when I woke up I had the really strong urge to make out with him a lot. And here I am now."

"Oh, you have it bad...."

"Yeah. And then, we had the problem of the ball, where we were supposed to have a date and everything. And then John goes and asks out Martha Manning, who is probably prettier and smarter- no not smarter- just, just less problematic than me. And here I am, probably the only person who doesn't have date-"

"I don't have a date."

"Wait what? But you're- you're like the best of women. Who wouldn't ask you out," Alex said incredulously. She shrugged.

"It's fine, I don't really care, I mean the only reason I would want a date is to get Peggy to shut up about it...."

"Hey," Alex said timidly. "Do you want to go... together?" 

"To piss off our friends?"

"To piss off our friends."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Eliza looked beautiful. She was wearing a blue dress, kinda old fashioned, but it fit her perfectly. It was at that point where Alex realized if he had never met John, he probably would have married her and had a happy life with 8 fat happy children. Of course, that didn't happen.

Alexander was just wearing simple dress robes. 

"To the ball?" He offered her his arm.

"To the ball."

 

 

The atmosphere of the ball was wonderful. There were Halloween decorations everywhere, somehow spooky and comforting at the same time. Half of the students were wearing costumes, and the other half were wearing fancy elaborate dress clothes.

"How come you're not wearing a costume," Alex asked Eliza.

"Well, technically I am. I mean, this is like an 1800s style dress."

Peggy and Hercules went all out on their costumes. Peggy was dressed like a very rich widow with a terrible secret. 

"My name is Janet Snakehole," she said dramatically when she saw them. "And I am a very rich widow with a terrible secret- wait are you two going together?" 

"Yeah-" she started when Hercules walked up to them. 

"Hello strange person who I have never met before," he said. He was wearing an FBI jacket from the Muggle world. Strange. "Who are you?"

"Babe, not now, 'Liza and Alex are going together to the ball," Peggy said, slapping Hercules' arm repeatedly. He made a surprised face.

"Woah, seriously? Come on babe, let's go." The two disappeared under a table that Alex and Eliza were talking to them over. 

"Well then," Alex said. "Shall we go find Laf and Washington?"

The two were dancing on the floor to a waltz. It was dreadfully romantic. Alexander would have hated to break it up.

"Hey fuck'os!" he said, bursting in between them. "How's it going!"

"Alex," Lafayette said disapprovingly. "We were having  _a moment."_

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Alex continued. "Where's 'gelica and John?"

"Angelica is over there," Eliza said, pointing to her. "Alex we literally walked right past them when we were looking for Laf. You have a one track mind."

"Oh, shit, she's probably pissed at the fact that I didn't acknowledge her, huh?"

"Well I don't think so, she was making out with Maria."

"Oh. Well then, shall we dance?" 

"Ok."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

John was probably having the worst day of his life. He was at the ball with Martha Manning. 

The first few minutes of the ball were ok, with John's only problem being Martha. Martha was, no other way to put it,  _annoying._ She and John barely knew each other, having met 30 minutes before the ball, and she was already begging him to make out with her. It was like she wanted him to knock her up that night, or something.

He found solace in being with his friends, excluding Angelica because she was on a date with someone she actually  _really really liked_ (John heard them talking shit about males as he was walking by them),excluding Eliza because she wasn't there yet, and excluding Alexander because being next to Alexander would have only made his problems worse. 

And then Alexander came, accompanied by Eliza. 

They were going to the ball together.  _On a date._ John's heart broke when he saw them walk through the halls. Granted, his heart swelled when he saw Alex, wearing the nicest sexiest dress robes he had ever seen, but then he saw Eliza by his side.

 _Of course,_ John thought.  _He was on a date with Eliza, and they were probably totally in love with each other, and Eliza is literally perfect for Alex and vice versa, and how did John ever think that he stood a chance to be with Alex, and......_

And then John saw Eliza and Alex dance together, and he  _just gave up._

"Come on," he said, pulling Martha with him. He was able to hold her off for a good time,  _but what was the point anymore?_ He didn't know if Alexander saw him, he hasn't seen him yet.  _He didn't care,_ John tried to tell himself. 

He led Martha to a corner of the room, and pulled her in for a kiss.  _It's Alexander,_ he told himself.  _You're making out with Alexander._ _It's Alexander._

Of course, it didn't work, and he let Martha take the reins as he sat there listless, but the chant still went on.

_It's Alexander. It's Alexander. It's Alexander._

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Alexander was having the time of his life. Dancing with Eliza, hanging out with his friends. Alexander may have also downed a few butterbeers which would have contributed to his good mood. And then he decided to look for John.

That's when his world came crashing down. He found John in a secluded area, making out with his date Martha Mannings. 

And so Alex ran. He ran,  _no sprinted,_ out of the ball. And looked for a place to cry.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

"John. Hey John. What the fuck are you doing?" 

Lafayette's voice snapped John out of his trance. 

"Can't you see?" he replied sarcastically. "I'm in love." That only made Martha make out with him harder.

"Yeah? Well Alex just ran out of here crying, so your love ain't helping anyone."

John jumped up. "Well where the fuck is he?"

"I don't know-"

The doors of the Great Hall burst open, and in came Charles Lee.

"Troll! Troll!" He yelled. "Thought you would have wanted to know." And fainted.

Cue the chaos. There were students running everywhere, screaming their heads off. Even the teachers looked a bit panicked. John saw Seabury panic for a second, and then he left the Hall. 

"SILENCE," McGonagall roared. "Everyone, please, do not panic. Now, prefects will lead their house back to the dormitories."

She went and conferred with the teachers.

"GRYFFINDORS, GRYFFINDORS," their prefect yelled. "Keep up please and stay alert."

"Bye Martha," John said. She walked away to the Hufflepuffs dejectedly.

"Come on," Lafayette said. "We have to go to our dorms-"

"Wait," John said. "Alex doesn't know about the troll."

"Oh shit. Let's go find him."

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

It was so  _unbelievably hard_ to find a good place to cry. 

All the quiet places were filled with couples making out.

 _Love,_ Alexander thought bitterly.  _You only like it when it works out in your favor._

Alexander finally found peace in a girl's bathroom. Unfortunately, the bathroom was occupied. Alexander couldn't tell because he was too occupied with his thoughts, but then a loud roar shook him awake.

In front of him stood a troll. Massive, hideous, foul-breathed and just terrible in general. He screamed, and ran into one of the stalls. The troll, being the horrendous creature that it was, swung its club and destroyed the stalls. 

Alexander was not dead yet. He would have been if he would "FUCKING MOVE!", John yelled. 

Oh. John and Lafayette were here. Alexander was terribly happy to see them. 

"Hi!" he waved at them as he ran for cover underneath the sink. 

"REALLY ALEX?" John yelled. The troll aimed its club at the sink, and smashed it. Alex was able to roll away just in time to avoid a painful and horrible death. 

John and Lafayette began pelting it with rubble. Lafayette then climbed onto the troll's club, and somehow got onto its head. It took another swing at Alex, and missed.

"Guys!" Lafayette yelled from the troll's head. The troll was swinging its head around to try and get rid of them, but Lafayette was hanging on tightly. Somehow, Lafayette managed to stick their wand into the troll's nose. It tried even harder to swing them off.

The troll then grabbed Lafayette by their leg and held them upside down.

"GUYS," they yelled more urgently. The troll started to swing its club, aiming for them. "FUCKING DO SOMETHING."

"What?" John asked. 

"You fucking idiot," Alex said from under the sink. "WE GO TO A SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY, YOU SHOULD KNOW A COUPLE OF SPELLS THAT WILL SAVE THEM!!"

"Well, we're in the face of panic right now, HOW WOULD I FUCKING KNOW!" 

"Aww you guys are cute bickering like an old married couple, but if you haven't noticed, I'M DYING HERE," Lafayette yelled. He avoided the club a couple of times now.

Alex was making motions with his hand now, basically walking John through a spell. " _Wingardium Leviosa."_

 _"WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA,"_  John yelled. He was able to levitate the club out of the troll's hand. It floated higher, higher, higher until he lost control of it and the club dropped onto the troll's head. 

Lafayette dropped out of the troll's hand and backed away. The troll promptly fell onto the floor. 

"Eww," Lafayette said, pulling their wand out of the troll's nose. "Gross." 

John was horrified over what he just did.

Alex was overjoyed.

"YEAH TROLL," he yelled, making rude gestures towards it. "THAT'S RIGHT. YOU KNOCK US DOWN, WE GET THE FUCK BACK UP AGAIN. YOU SWING AT MY FRIENDS, YOU BETTER NOT MISS, YOU BETTER HAVE ANOTHER PUNCH TO THROW-"

"Alex," John said, putting a hand on his arm. "You didn't even kill it-"

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS," McGonagall yelled, storming into the bathroom. She was surrounded by an entourage of teachers. Seabury, Longbottom, Lee. Lee had a leg wound. Huh. "EXPLAIN YOURSELVES," she continued, pointing at John and Lafayette. 

"Er, well, what, um-"

"It was my fault," Alexander said. 

"Mr. Hamilton. Well I can't say that I am surprised."

"Well, yes, well I went looking for the troll. I read about them, and thought that I could handle it. But I-" he choked on this part. "I was wrong. If Laf and John hadn't come here and saved me, I would have been dead."

"I would say I am disappointed in you, but that would have meant that I expected you to stay out of trouble. Nevertheless, 5 points from Gryffindor for absolute stupidity. As for you two, understand that you are so lucky to be alive right now. 5 points will be awarded for your bravery. Each. For  _sheer dumb luck."_

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

"Well," Alex said, once they were all in their dorms. "That was interesting."

They all laughed. 

"Just imagine the Schuyler sisters' reaction to this," Lafayette said.

"Peggy would probably wish she came with us," John said. "Eliza and Angelica would fucking kill us."

"Yeah," Alex said. 

They went into a comfortable silence.

 

"Hey Alex?" John asked. He was thinking about the troll. He was just glad that Alex was safe.

"Yeah John?"

"Why did you leave the ball?" John hoped that this question wasn't too personal.

Silence.

"Alex?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Alex-"

"I  _don't want to talk about it,"_ he snapped.

John's heart broke.  _Alex didn't even trust him anymore,_ he thought. 

"Oh, ok then. Good night?"

"Night."

 

 

Both boys were quickly becoming experienced in the art of crying _without making a single sound_.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its not ya lit till the protag lets out a breath they didn't know they were holding


	9. Quidditch (again)

"Hey John? John wake up."

Alex was shaking him awake.

"Hey," he said. He looked up. Alex was hovering over him.

"Hey," Alex said, leaning back on his knees. "So, uh, are you, um, mad at me for being super snappy last night?"

_Mad?_

"I could never be mad at you."

_It was true. John could never be mad at Alex, he loved him too much._

Alex heard those words, and he smiled. It was like looking at the stars. 

 

* * *

 

 

"Eat up, you have a big day ahead of you," Eliza said affectionately. It was true. The Gryffindors had their first quidditch game today, them versus Slytherin. 

"So, are the rumors true?" Angelica said, walking up to them, and sitting next to Eliza. 

"Where were you?" Eliza asked her. Angelica  _did_ go missing for the first half of breakfast.

"With Maria." She winked.  _There's too much love in the air,_ John thought bitterly. "So are the rumors true?"

"What rumors?" Alex asked.

"That you, John, and Laf killed the troll."

"You did what now?" Eliza said. John laughed, Alex smiled, and Laf looked a bit sheepish. 

Peggy and Hercules looked outraged. 

"How come you guys get to have all the fun!" Peggy exclaimed. "You guys get to encounter carnivorous plants and trolls, and all Herc and I get to do is spike the punch or-"

"Margarita Peggy Schuyler-" Eliza started, but was cut of by Hercules. 

"Margarita?" He laughed. 

"Yes, my birth name is Margarita and if you call me anything other than Peggy, I will make you regret the day you were born-"

"It's fine, Peggs," Lafayette said. "Us Gryffindors are gonna make him regret that day when we decimate him in the game today-"

"Which you will do horribly in if you don't eat!" Eliza exclaimed.

"Fine." John slurped his pumpkin juice angrily. 

 

 

* * *

 

"And the game begins!" 

Gryffindor vs. Slytherin. John felt like they had a pretty good chance at winning, they just had to watch out for Maria and Hercules. 

He and Laf were doing pretty well. John would soar around the pitch, keeping the bludgers away from their fellow team members. He saw Angelica and Peggy sitting in the Slytherin side, rooting for the Slytherins.

"Angelica!" he yelled at her.

"Sorry, gotta root for my girlfriend!"

John rolled his eyes.

The game was going wonderfully, with Gryffindors ahead of Slytherins, when John's broom began to act up. 

His broom starting jerking uncontrollably, as if it were trying to throw him off. John tried to hold on, one hand on the broom and one hand stuck to his bat. He tried to regain control, but then the broom flipped over, and John was hanging from it with one hand. He faintly heard screaming from the Gryffindor side, Alexander's voice being loudest of them all. John tried to climb onto his broom again.

But John was dizzy. The broom was going around in circles, jerking back and forth. And John only had one hand to work with, the other holding on to his bat, because if he dropped his bat, he was useless to the game. 

And then his broom stopped jerking. It was finally cooperating, and John was trying to get back on when a bludger came and hit the broom. And John fell into the pitch.

He barely remembered what happened next.

Hitting the ground.

Screams from the crowd.

Excruciating pain in his right shoulder.

Alex and his friends shaking him.

Alex.

Darkness.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oops


	10. good luck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> no but seriously good luck this chapter is horribly written haha lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKCANWEJUSTTALKABOUTTHEIRGRAMMYPERFORMANCEITWASFUCKINGPERFECTANDTHEYKILLEDMEANDJASMINEJUMPINGUPANDDOWNSHEISMEANDRENEEANDJAVIERANDANTHONYWITHTHEFUCKINGFLADANDLINSFUCKONGSPEECHSABASTIANDADDYSGONNABRINGHOMEAGRAMMYFORUANDILOVEDYINGANDBEINGDEAD

Alexander was sitting in the bleachers, next to Washington and Eliza at the quidditch game between Gryffindors and Slytherins. The three of them were rooting for Gryffindors (obviously), but Peggy and Angelica were supporting Slytherins. 

"TRAITORS," Alex yelled teasingly at them, when they were heading to the Slytherin side. All was going well in the game (Alexander wasn't  _really_ there for the actual game, he was there to support his friends and to watch John's glorious hair bounce around) until John lost control of his broom.

Alexander leaped up when he saw this.  _But John was really good at flying,_ he though.  _There was no way he would loose control of the broom._

He saw Angelica and Peggy hurry towards them.

"Hey," Eliza said. "What is happening?"

"I don't know," Peggy said. "I-"

"Look," Angelica yelled, and she pointed to where the teachers were sitting. Seabury was muttering, with his eyes faced on John.

"Do you think he's casting a spell on him?" Washington asked. The broom was being more uncontrollable by the second. Other quidditch players were starting to notice. Lafayette was keeping an eye on John, simultaneously playing while watching him. Hercules was staring at John worriedly, but he probably couldn't help John because he was on the opposing team.

"I think so, I mean you do need constant eye contact and stuff," Angelica said. "We need to break the spell."

"I'm on it," Peggy said, and she sneaked away. Lord knows what she's going to do.

"Hurry!" Eliza called after her, and then they all returned their attention on John. He dangling from the broom now.

Alex started shouting encouragement at him. "COME ON JOHN, STAY ON THERE. STAY ALIVE!" he yelled.  _Hurry Peggy, hurry,_ he thought. John looked like he was about to break.

Lafayette started flying toward John, and took their attention off of keeping bludgers away. Because of that, a bludger hit John's broom. And he fell.

And then the area where the teachers were sitting promptly bursted into flames.

John fell, and landed on his right shoulder. His bat fell from his hand, and he lay there, lifeless.

Alexander was horrified. He felt like he needed to do something, needed to fix John, but he couldn't make himself move.

Peggy reappeared at his side. "Alex, come on," she said, shaking him. 

The group made their way into the pitch, and ran over to John. Alex started shaking him. "Come on, John, come on, wake the fuck up-"

"Out of my way!" McGonagall yelled. "Oh," she said, looking down at John. "He hurt his shoulder real bad. Ok, you four get him to the hospital wing. Quick." She turned toward the students watching the game. "The game still continues," she said loudly. "A quidditch game only ends when the snitch is caught. Gryffindor will just have to do without a beater." The Gryffindors groaned, and the quidditch players resumed their game. Alex saw Lafayette and Hercules look sad, but then they kept playing.

The four of them carried John to the Hospital Wing. Alex tried to convince the others that he could carry John by himself.

"You're too small," Washington said. "You're like a small little child. It's like I have a son."

When they got there, carrying John's alive but limp body, Madam Pomfrey made a huge fuss over him. 

"Oh, look at him," she said upon seeing John. "You probably dislocated his shoulder just by the way you carried him! Here, lay him on this bed, I'll tend to him." She bustled about, grabbing ingredients for some kind of medicine. "Oh, go on now. Shooo!" 

Angelica and Washington left. Washington left a cute little pat on John's head. "Get well soon John," Angelica said upon exiting. "I mean, you probably can't hear me, but see ya later."

"How are they making such little fuss about this?" Alex asked Eliza and Peggy. Eliza smiled softly.

"We weren't Muggle born. We've seen quidditch injuries before, and anyways, Madam Pompfrey can cure almost anything. There's nothing to worry about," Eliza said reassuringly. She patted John's hand, and then made her way out. Madam Pompfrey also left the room, probably going to grab more stuff. "Don't worry about it Alex."

He looked over to Peggy. She looked distraught. 

"Hey, are you ok?" he asked her. She shook her head. "Hey what's wrong?" Alex hugged her. 

"I feel like this is my fault," she confided to him, speaking to the cloth on his chest. "If only I had gotten there faster, I could have-"

"Shhh," Alex said. "It is not your fault, Peggy Schuyler. You did your very best, and the bludger would have probably still hit him. And what you did was pretty awesome. Setting the teachers on fire, that's a story we'll tell our children."

"Thanks," Peggy muttered. She looked up at him, her eyes misty. "Don't worry about John, ok? He'll be fine."

She left, and Alex was all alone with John. John's right shoulder looked seriously messed up; it was dirty, bloody, and his robes were sticking to the injury so there was no telling how serious it was. John's face looked peaceful and like he was in serious pain at the same time. There was a bit of hair in his face. Alex moved to brush it away, when the doors bursted open and Madam Pomfrey hurried in. 

"Out!" she said, gesturing to the door. "I told you, out!"

"But I need to see if he's ok!"

"He will be ok if you would leave so I can treat him-"

"Well-"

"Look," she said, sighing. "It's obvious that you really care about this young man. A lot. Now, can you  _please_ leave so that I can treat him and I'll call for you whenever I am done," she said softly. 

Alex nodded. "Ok then," he said, his voice thick with emotion. He would stand down. For John.

 

 

* * *

 

 

What happened after the game was a blur to John. He remembered everything before he fell. The rest was just fragments.

He remembered how Alex was shaking him, trying to wake him.  _My shoulder,_ John thought.  _You're hurting my shoulder._

He remembered arguments between Alex and another woman (Madam Pompfrey, perhaps?). Alex lost the argument.

He remembered shrill screaming from Martha Manning. Alex was by his side when Martha went to visit him.

He remembered how Alex barely left his side, how his friends had to bring him food, and sent him parchment and ink so that Alex could work while staying near John.

Alex was by his side when John woke up. 

John felt weak. He hadn't had any real food in like, a week. He was mostly unconscious, for a week. He also had a strong ache in his right shoulder. His eyes fluttered open.

"Hey?" he said to Alex. The two were alone in the room. Alex was writing something. Alex looked like he barely slept in the past week. He also looked like he barely ate, in the past week.  _What did I expect?_ John thought. 

"Oh my god hey!" Alex said, practically pouncing on John. "How are you? Are you ok? Do you know how worried I've been? Do you need anything, I-"

"Did we win?" John asked. Alex rolled his eyes. 

"Oh my god, that's so you, you little piece of shit," Alexander said, and took John's head in his hands. And kissed him.

_Oh my god._

The kiss destroyed him. In more ways than one.

It was everything John could have asked for, and more. The kiss was full of pent up energy, like they just had to take the weight off of their chests. It was passionate, it was wild, it was Alexander. It felt like a great burden had been lifted, like the two were meant to have this moment if they only waited.

And then the kiss destroyed him. Because John knew that this wasn't supposed to happen. John knew the consequences. He knew about his father, how John would never be safe again if it got any further than this. 

And so John stopped it. With a heavy heart, he broke it off. He took his good hand and pushed Alex off of him. 

"I can't," John said. "I'm so so sorry."

Alex's face broke him. It was full of despair, longing, like his world was going to shatter. And it was because of John. 

'What's wrong," Alex said quickly. He was so eager to make it right, but he couldn't do anything. "I mean, John, I like you a lot, and we can make it work, we can-"

"Alexander. Stop," John looked away. "We can't do it. My father will hear about this."

"John, we can make this work." Alex took his hand. "Please-"

"We can't. My father will hear about this." John pulled his hand away. "Please just go. Please."

Alex stood up, his eyes misty. He walked to the door. "I'm sorry," he said, and left. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cant believe it im going through my work (which is painful to read tbh how do u guys do it) and making it more "professional" i cant believe myself sometimes  
> can you believe it? me? professional?  
> can you imagine?  
> omg its quiet uptown ruined the word imagine for me i can never say it again


	11. i put my characters through too much pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> theyre not even characters theyre fucking historical figures that i am writing hogwarts aus about  
> as for the actual chapter  
> its a fucking mess have fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im quickly becoming obsessed with les mis i dont have time or energy for all these obsessions help me  
> and the lams tag is always either super empty or 50 people update at once  
> in the middle of the night  
> when im asleep  
> and i read like a paragraph and i have to got to school  
> and i cant read it at school cause people would be like WHY R U READING SMUT ABOUT FOUNDING FATHER ALEXANDER HAMILTON  
> help me
> 
> OH MY GOD THIS IS ME IN THE FUTURE OF THAT LAST NOTE LIKE 2 HRS AGO AND LIKE 2 NEW PEEPS UPLOAD HAM FANDOM GET UR SHIT TOGETHER RATION UR UPDATES JESUS

Alexander didn't know what to do. He just made one of the  _stupidest_ mistakes in his life, and that was saying a lot. 

He sat down against the wall, outside in the corridor of the hospital, and just thought about stuff. 

 _I just kissed John fucking Laurens._ Alex pressed his forehead to his knees.  _Awesome. Wow. And I just ruined our friendship._ Alexander had a bit of a habit of screwing everything up. 

Alex just sat there, for a long time, crying a little bit, replaying that kiss scene in his head, because  _goddammit that was one of the best moments of his life._ The aftermath, not so much. 

Some time later, he heard footsteps. It was Peggy and Hercules. 

"Well maybe," Peggy was saying. "You can take the polyjuice and oh my god Alex!"

Alex looked up at him. He probably looked horrible, his eyes red, his hair a mess, extreme dark circles. 

"I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine," Alexander said. Peggy crouched down next to him. 

"You are not fine, man," Hercules said. "What the fuck happened?"

"John-" Alex said, and then promptly burst into tears. Peggy grabbed him. She shooed at Hercules, mouthing at him to go and visit John. Alex clung to Peggy's clothes.

"Shhhh, hey," Peggy said comfortingly. She planted a chaste kiss on the top of his head. "Hey. What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about-"

"Alexander Hamilton. I am not going to let you bottle up your emotions like you did when you figured out that you liked John."

"How do you know-"

"Me and Herc? We're like spies. We know everything." They both laughed. "Now come on, you can tell your lil' sis Peggy anything."

"I kissed John," he whispered. 

"Why?"

"I don't know," Alex said. "I was just in the heat of the moment, you know?"

"I'm sure I don't know what you mean, you forget yourself."

"It just happened, it was like my instinct to kiss him."

Peggy looked at him sadly. "Do you know who his father is?" 

"No?"

"Alex, that's not a question-"

"I know, but like we would never talk about our past with each other. It was like an mutual agreement that was never spoken, I don't talk about my childhood and he wouldn't talk about his."

"Oh, Alex." 

"He kept saying it too, he was all like, my father will hear about this, after I kissed him, Peggy, I don't know what to do."

"I'm not going to tell you about his father, that's not my story to tell. I don't know, Alex. Just hang in there. You're going to be ok." 

"Peggs, you're like the best."

"I know. And if you call me Peggs one more time I will kill you. Don't act like I don't know how." They laughed. "No, but seriously Alex. You guys are going to be ok." She petted his hair. "Listen, I gotta go to class. Don't be too hard on yourself. And eat something. And sleep. And go to your fucking classes."

Hercules was exiting the medical room. They waved goodbye, and Alexander was once again alone with his thoughts.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 "Hey."

Hercules walked into the hospital wing. He was holding something, chocolate frogs maybe?

"Hi," said John from his bed. Hercules walked over.

"Wow, this place is a mess." He was looking at the area around the bed.

"What? Oh-" It was a mess. There were papers everywhere, some written on, and some completely bank. "I didn't notice."

"What do you mean, you didn't notice? How did these even get here?"

"I'm used to it, you know?" John shrugged. "This is what me and Alex's dorm looks like. These are probably all Alex's."

Hercules nodded in understanding. "That's explains a lot." He sighed. "Welp. How are you?" He placed chocolate frogs on the stand, and sat down on the stool that Alex used.

"I'm fine, but I'm stuck here for another few days." John rolled his eyes. "I'm so fucking bored help me."

"Excuse me, you have it easy with not having to deal with Seabury and that shit."

"I thought Seabury was the head of your house."

"Doesn't mean that I have to fucking like him."

John cracked a smile. "So, uh, how's it going between you and Peggy, hmmmm?"

Hercules rolled his eyes. "You know what fuck you." John laughed. "But Peggy's amazing. I want to grow up and start a prank shop with her or something. Fucking fabulous. And how's," Hercules continued, poking John in the chest. "Is it going between you and Martha?"

"Oh, um," John stammered. "Great, you know? I mean, I totally, um, like her, and stuff."

"You're so fucking blind sometimes. Hey, I gotta go to class. See ya." Hercules stood up, and walked towards the exit. And tripped on a piece of paper. "And fucking clean that up!"

"Bye," John said, rolling his eyes. Maybe he should clean it up. He stood up, walking around, grabbing papers from the floor. He stacked them up and was about to place them on the nightstand next to his bed, when he saw a paper with his name on it. 

"What the fuck?" John muttered, grabbing the letter. He placed the stack on his nightstand, climbed into the bed, and read the letter. 

_To my dearest, John,_

_Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships, I wish, my dear Laurens, it might be in my power, by actions rather than words, to convince you that I love you. I shall only tell you that 'till you bade us Adieu, I hardly knew the value you had taught my heart to set upon you. Indeed, my friend, it was not well done. You know the opinion I entertain of mankind, and how much it is my desire to preserve myself free from particular attachments, and to keep my happiness independent on the caprice of others. You should not have taken advantage of my sensibility to steal into my affections without my consent. But as you have done it and as we are generally indulgent to those we love, I shall not scruple to pardon the fraud you have committed, on condition that for my sake, if not for your own, you will always continue to merit the partiality, which you have so artfully instilled into me. Don't forget, that I [- - - - - -]_

_Yours forever,_

_A. Ham_

 Wow. On and on it went, being so very explicit. There were five words crossed off at the end. Actually it didn't look crossed off. More like censored. And it was from Alex. 

"Wow." John needed to think this through.

 

 

 

 

It was the middle of the night. John couldn't sleep. He was plagued by thoughts of Alexander. 

So he decided to wander around Hogwarts. 

 _Smart move,_ he thought to himself sarcastically.  _Oh my god I'm talking to myself what's wrong with me. So many things..._

To be honest, John just didn't care anymore. He knew that his father had connections, so he wouldn't get into too much trouble anyways. 

So he decides to walk around Hogwarts. Carefully, of course, but he just needed to get out of the hospital room. 

It was difficult. He did suffer a serious injury. But he endured it, just like he endured everything else. 

He finally found a nice, quiet room to sit in. It was large, with an old, mystic feel like most of the places in Hogwarts. And, in the center, was a mirror.

John walked towards it, and sat down in front of it. He looked at the reflection. And promptly jumped out of surprise. 

The reflection wasn't just him. It was him, with Alex. They were very close, no, hugging, no, Alex was basically sitting in John's lap. 

 _Wow, PDA much?_ John thought. 

And then reflection Alexander began making out with reflection John and real John almost fell over. While he was sitting down.

 _Oh my god,_ he thought. He heard a creak of a door. He looked over. Nothing.  _Wow we're cute together. I would ship it. Of course you fucking would you're in love with him._

And so John just sat there, watching the reflections.

It was not until he was leaving that he realized that the mirror showed their greatest desire.

And his greatest desire was Alexander fucking Hamilton. 

 

 

* * *

 

 

Alex couldn't focus. Usually, instead of sleeping, he would stay up reading or studying. The only time he would sleep was when Lafayette would drag him to bed.  They soon realized it was a lost cause when John wasn't around. But he couldn't focus on his (text)book. So he donned his invisibility cloak, and decided to wander around. 

Walking around with no purpose was great and all until he saw Filch's cat. The fucking devil cat. Alex then ran and went into the closest classroom he could find. 

The classroom was pretty old and abandoned. It was completely empty, except for a large mirror and-oh- John. John was sitting in front of the mirror, staring at the reflection.  _What the fuck?_ Alex thought.  _Is he just staring at himself in the mirror?_

Alex was confused. But he shrugged it off, and he sat near John, and watched him. John would smile from time to time while watching the mirror. It took him a while, but Alex finally realized what the mirror was. 

It was the Mirror of Erised. He read about it in one of his books, during that time when he was avoiding John and researching Nicholas Flamel.

The mirror would show someone their greatest desire.  _What is his greatest desire?_ Alex thought.  _What is_  my _greatest desire._

Alex thought that his greatest desire would be him, in the future, high in the social class, with his legacy secure, and dependent on no one for his happiness. 

He had no idea what John's greatest desire would be. He just didn't know anymore. Maybe a few weeks ago, he would have known, but the relationship between him and John changed, for better or for worse.

Some time later John left, and Alex was able to look into the mirror himself. He took off his cloak and stood in front of it. He saw himself, hand in hand with John. He was in front of the white house, and doing other stuff that Alex didn't care about. Alex was only watching him and John. 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

John was bored. He was stuck in the hospital for what seemed like forever. He did read the letter again. He read it over lots of times. But he needed adventure, so he decided to visit the mirror again.

He got there and just watched the reflection of him and Alex. And then he heard a voice.

"Holy shit," it said. It sounded like Alex's voice. John leapt up to his feet, and pulled his wand out.

"Alex?" John said hesitantly. The air around the door wavered, and then a head popped out. And then a body, and Alex was there, holding an invisibility cloak. He grinned sheepishly.

"Hi." he said eloquently, shuffling his feet. 

John was bewildered. He exasperatedly put a hand to his forehead. "Hi?" 

"Hey." Alex shifted his wait around.  _Wow,_ John thought.  _For once in his life he's not talking._

There was a bit of awkward silence, and strong tension. Neither of them were really talking. It was so fucking quiet. 

So John decided to break the silence. In the worst possible way.

"I read that letter," John blurted out. 

"I'm sorry I kissed you," Alex said at the same time.

Immediately, Alex looked horrified. He turned pale, a surprising feat for someone who was born in the Caribbean. 

"I have to go immediately," he said, putting on his invisibility cloak. "Sorry, but I have to go home-"

"Alex!" John said, walking over to Alex and grabbing his arms. "Fucking listen. I'm not mad at you because you kissed me."

Alex fidgeted. "Look, are you sure, cause I can just move to Canada or something-"

"Can we talk?"

Alex bit his lip.  _Goddammit that was cute,_ John thought. 

"Please?" he continued. 

Alex nodded his head hesitantly. 

 

"Hey," John said soothingly. Alex looked so shaken. "It's ok. Um, let's sit down."

John led Alex to sit in front of the mirror, facing each other.

"I'm sorry-" Alex began.

"Hey," John said. "I'm not mad at you because you kissed me."

"You're not?" Alex looked confused. "But you- I thought that- you rejected me?!" Alex exclaimed. 

"I didn't reject you because I didn't like you," John said, leaning back on his hand. "Actually, I like you a lot." He sighed. "It's complicated."

"Ok, first of all, don't you get fucking started on the 'it's complicated' bull shit I can fucking take it," Alex said. _He's returning to his normal self,_ John thought affectionately. "And I thought you were fucking straight."

John laughed hysterically. "Me? Straight?" he said, pointing to himself. He laughed some more. "Alex, you have to be fucking kidding me-"

Alex threw his hands up defensively. "I'm sorry?!"

"And I thought _you_ were straight," John told Alex. 

Alex laughed. "Oh wow. No, I'm bi. What made you fucking think that I was straight?"

"The fact that you flirted with every female we've met," John said. Alex rolled his eyes. "And what made you think that I was straight?"

"Well, I, er-" Alex stammered. "I don't know, just that you being gay seemed to good to be true."

"Yeah? Well I'm really fucking gay, so ya."

"Wait!" Alex said, pointing at John. "Martha!"

John sighed. "Martha, a pain in the ass, that's what she is."

"What do you mean?" Alex looked confused.

"I just asked her out, cause, you know, you're supposed to get a date and stuff."

"That doesn't mean you have to make out with her in a secluded corner."

"Yea, but you know what?" John said. He was getting kind of annoyed now. "I only let her make out with me when I saw _you,_ " John said, pointing Alex in the chest. "Go to the ball with Eliza."

"Oh," Alex said. He looked sad. "Sorry to mislead you. We just kind of did that to piss off all of yall, and we both didn't have dates so..."

"Eliza didn't have a date?" John exclaimed. "I mean, you, I can understand-" Alex punched him playfully in the shoulder. "But Eliza, she's like the best!"

"I know right!" They both lapsed into a comfortable silence.  

 

"Hey," Alex asked hesitantly. "If you like me and all, why did you push me off when I tried to kiss you?"

"Oh. That," John said. He sighed. "I really don't want to talk about it-"

"Please?" Alex said, looking up at John with puppy eyes. "I wan't to fix it, so that we can be together."

"Alex you don't even know what the problem is-"

"Well if you would just  _tell me_ I bet we could find a way around it-"

"Alright!" John yelled. Alex shrunk back. "Oh my god, I didn't mean to yell at you-"

"It's ok, just tell me about the problem."

"Ok," John said, pushing his hair out of his face. "It's my dad."

"Your dad?"

"You wouldn't understand-"

"John, I'm really fucking smart. Test me."

John smiled. "My dad is an asshole."

"Like Jefferson level assholery, or-"

"Worse. Like a billion times worse."

"Oh my god, I hate him already."

"Yea. So he's some big hot shot politician now. And he's super rich-we're super rich- because he runs a fucking house elf trade thing."

"Oh my god."

"Yea. He wants me to become a lawyer-"

"I might want to be a lawyer-"

"Yea, well that's your life, Alex." John said. "But he's like going to make me take a bunch of lawyer-y classes and I want to become someone who works with animals or a doctor or something-"

"You? A doctor? With your fucking recklessness?"

"Strange, huh. Ya but I don't know. I should probably please him. Oh, and he's also super fucking homophobic."

"Oh," Alex said, nodding his head sympathetically. 

"Yea, he always threatens me and tells me to get a girlfriend or something, and I'm just so fucking sick of it. And then, there were those nights where he drank-"

At that, John started crying. Alex leaned forward and wrapped his arms around John.

"Hey," he said soothingly. "He can't hurt you now, I mean, he's far away and stuff-"

"Yes he can," John retorted viciously. "He has so many connections, if I mess up at all, he'll be able to ruin my life forever...."

John pressed his face into Alex's robes. 

"I'm sorry I pressured you into talking about it," Alex told him. John shook his head.

"No, you needed to know."

"So, uh, um," Alex stammered. It was getting very awkward, with John pressed to his chest, the sexual tension thick. "Should I-"

"Can you just talk?" 

"What?" 

"Just talk," John repeated. "I want to hear your voice."

"Um, sure? I mean, considering how much I talk, I'm not sure why you would want to hear more of my voice, but ok then." John laughed. Alex smiled, happy that he was able to cheer him up a little bit. He looked around, his eyes landing on the mirror. "Hey, you know that mirror? That's the Mirror of Erised. I know about it, I read it somewhere. It shows your greatest desire. You know, I thought that my greatest desire would be me being successful after I built something that's gonna outlive me or some shit. And then I looked in the mirror and I saw me hand in hand with you.

Do you realize that? You changed my fucking life, John Laurens. I had this whole plan, where I was going to write my way out, graduate in two or something. And then I met you, and I was like, huh, maybe it could wait. You changed my fucking life."

John looked up at him hesitantly. "Can you tell me about that letter?" he asked. 

Alex laughed nervously. "Oh, so, um, yeah, about that. So you were, um, like in a coma. And I was fucking panicking and overwhelmed with  _the feels,_ you know? It was like a frantic feverish letter cause I really really like you and I was super worried that you wouldn't get up and oh my god I'm dying of embarrassment."

They were quiet again, the sexual tension even thicker since they were basically pressed against each other. After a while, John said, "I saw us in the mirror."

"Huh?"

"Me and you. We were like  _together."_

"Oh."

 

"You know, you changed my life too Alex."

"Hmmm?" Alex was stroking John's hair now.

"Yea. You gave me a fucking purpose. Back then, my plan was just to ride it out, die in glory or some shit. Didn't really have anything to live for. Then you came around, and like, wow..."

"John," Alex said, grabbing him. "Promise me you will _never_ harm yourself."

John bit his lip, looking up at Alex. "Can I kiss you?"

"But your father-"

"Listen, I really really want to be with you and my lack of common sense is really prevailing today and if you would just let me be reckless-"

"But-"

"Alex. Listen. Sometimes the reward is greater than the risk.

And besides, we can keep it a secret."

"It's not like us to keep things a secret," Alex murmured, looking at John. 

"We can try."

At that, Alex leaned into John. They pressed their lips together, noses bumping a little bit. The kiss was nothing like the previous one. The last one Alex kissed John like he was running out of time. This one felt like they were trying to tell each other that it would last and it would fucking work out. It was like Alex was saying,  _I'll stand down for you, I'll do fucking anything for you John, if you would only let me._ There was a lot of shit going on in John's life, shit like his fucking father, but the kiss awakened something in John. It gave him hope. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for some reason im always satisfied (yes i know what i did there) with tragedies for endings so thats why it took so long to write sorry  
> and i was on tumblr  
> and i had writer's block?  
> and im a lazy piece of shit  
> and tumblr  
> i also may have written it and let it sit as a draft for a long time cause i was going to edit it later  
> i totally did not forget to actually post it what


	12. clubbing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> no not the smutty one and no not the pretentious golf one although i do need to learn how to write smut  
> i forgot to set up for end so this is doing it with extra fluff and fun cause these kids deserve some fluff u kno  
> time jump a bit say this is around winter or something idk i dont outline these things out ok  
> actually no ok heres the timing the last 2 were around thanksgiving, im not actually writing thanksgiving lazy remember?  
> so this is between thanksgiving and christmas oh well time to skip like 5 months for the next chapters because i cant pace for my fucking life  
> in the meantime have your badly written fluff

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i made a mistake  
> i listened to book of mormon  
> and this is going to be a really fucking big obsession i can feel it  
> and i still have to listen to les mis and in the heights a 96,000 times to basically memorize them  
> i dont have the emotional energy for all of this

"We should join a club!"

The Revolutionary Crew, excluding Washington because he was doing some prefect things, were eating breakfast. Peggy was the one who said that, she was all happy and bouncy and an absolute ray of sunshine. 

"Peggy," Lafayette said, looking at her. "It's December."

"I know," Peggy said, eyes shining. "But we should still! Hey Alex, there's a dueling club," she said, raising her eyebrows mischievously.

Burr, walking past them at the time, yelled at them, "Dueling is dumb and immature!"

"Hey," Alex replied.

"What?"

"Shut up."

"Rude."

"Hey I was quoting Shakespeare!" Alex said, throwing his hands up. John laughed, bumping into Alex. 

"So? Can we? Can we? Can we?" Peggy said. She was such a child sometimes, it was adorable. 

"I'll do it," Alex said. 

"I'll do it too," John told Peggy. "I heard that there's an art club."

"Aren't you a bit loaded up considering you have quidditch?" Angelica asked Peggy. 

"You have quidditch also!"

"Yeah, but I'm older, so I'm more responsible."

"Yeah older by an hour!"

"Geniuses, lower your voices," Eliza said, pulling it together with her Mom Friend™ tendencies. "I'll join you."

Lafayette just rolled their eyes. "God, all of you are such nerds."

 

 

 

"Hey, there's no debate club."

Alex and John were standing in front of the Gryffindor pasteboard, looking for a club to join so that they could satisfy Peggy. 

"Huh? Weird." John was thinking of maybe joining the art club, or the Magical Creatures club. 

"Hey do you think we can start one?" The two were standing near each other, a lot of eye fucking happening between them. There was a lot of PDA happening between them, more than usual as Alex was already very clingy as he was. Their relationship right now basically consisted of a bunch of making out in random closets and teasing and eye fucking and wishing that they had time alone together to get it on. It became a pastime. 

"Maybe," John said. Alex laid his head on his shoulder. 

"I really want to make out with you right now." John smiled. 

"The feeling's mutual."

 

 

 

 

"Hey John!"

"What?"

The two of them were in the library, working on homework. Well, John was working on homework, Alex finished it ages ago and was doing god knows what.

"I've decided to start a debate club!"

"Ok?"

"It's gonna be awesome, I already wrote like a two foot essay on why we should have it."

"Two feet?" John was struggling to write 10 inches on moonstone and its uses, and Alex was spitting out two foot essays on extracurriculars. 

"Yeah! It's gonna be great, I'm gonna write more about it and then give it to McGonagall and she has to say yes!"

"Ok then."

 

 

 

"You want to start a debate club?"

The two of them were in McGonagall's office, seeking permission for the club. John was there for moral support.

Alex nodded his head eagerly. McGonagall held up his two feet and seven inch essay, scanning through it. 

"Did you get any professors to supervise?"

"I'm sure Mr. Longbottom would do it," Alex replied. "If you read my essay you will see that I thought of practically everything."

John suppressed a smile.  _Classic Hamilton._

"Well," McGonagall said, laying the essay down. "I suppose you won't let me say no."

Alex shook his head. 

"You can have your club."

Alex beamed, hoisting himself up on the chair with his hands and kicking his feet happily. 

"Now go on, I have work to do." McGonagall shooed them out. 

 

 

 

 

"Hello people, welcome to debate club."

They were in a classroom, Alex standing at a podium. An assortment of students had attended. Amongst the crowd were the Revolutionary Crew, excluding Peggy and Hercules because they were not there, Maria, Jefferson, Madison, Burr, and a few other students. Professor Longbottom was sitting in on the sides, watching them with a bemused expression. 

"I'm Alexander Hamilton, at your service. I guess were going to split up into two, and debate things. So, um, split up into two groups, and have twenty minutes to research the topic, and pick a candidate to debate it." He gave an awkward smile. "So our topic, um, let's debate whether keeping house elves is right."

The students wandered around, talking amongst each other. Alex reached John.

"Why'd you chose this topic?" John asked him, bemused.

"I don't know. I panicked. And besides, I know for a fact that Jefferson has house elves, and we'll be able to destroy him in the debate." John smiled.

"Hey! How are we supposed to research the topic if we don't have any books!" Jefferson yelled at Alex from across the room.

"Oh, shit, um, HOLD ON," Alex stumbled about. "Imma go to the library and grab some books," Alex hurriedly John. He didn't really plan this out, he didn't think he'd get that far. Eliza saw him run out. 

"Need any help!" she yelled after him.

"Yeah, come on!" Eliza and Alex rushed out.

"So where's Peggy?" he asked her, making conversation. 

"I don't know, she's off with Herc somewhere."

"You think they might be, you know?"

"Peggy knows what she wants. It's her life," Eliza said as they heard what sounded like fireworks from a distance. And then, the unmistakable laughter of Hercules and Peggy. "Oh my god. They're off making trouble again. I've got to go, sorry." Eliza sped towards the noise. "Magarita Peggy Schuyler van Rensselear, I swear to god...." she muttered as she walked away.

"Hey at least you know they're not banging," Alex yelled after her.

 

 

 

Minutes later, Alex reappeared back in the classroom with an armful of books. He dumped them on a table, and haughtily said, "Proceed."

He walked over to John. "So this is our group?"

It consisted of John, Angelica, Maria, and Lafayette. Washington was on the other side. Alex looked at him disapprovingly. 

"George thought that the other side needed more people," Lafayette told him apologetically. They consisted of Burr, Madison, Jefferson, and some other kids Alex didn't know the name of.

"Oh my god, he's such a dad sometimes. Whatever. We're supporting house elf rights?"

"Obviously," John drawled.

"So, I think we should...." 

And so they began planning for their debate. The boy's opinion being the loudest of them all, but Angelica and Maria occasionally coming in and shutting them down. From a bystander's viewpoint, it was hilarious. Professor Longbottom kept looking at them argue, and he would chuckle softly. 

Twenty minutes later (well twenty minutes according to Alex, which meant his team had as much time as they wanted), the groups chose their candidates, and argued. John, Alex, and Lafayette volunteered, but Angelica was chosen instead. She put up a very convincing argument on why she should be the one debating. 

"I want to do it," John whined. 

"Yeah, but I am the chosen one, so deal with it," Angelica replied. The opposing side chose Jefferson, which was strange since Alex knew that he couldn't publicly speak for jack shit. Washington was moderating them.

"The issue on the table," he said. "Should house elves be allowed or not? Angelica, you have the floor."

She leaned against her podium. There were two of them, facing each other. She smiled, batting her eyes and showing off her cleavage to the already flustered Jefferson. He looked so scared and nervous. He didn't stand a chance against Angelica. 

"Do you see that? I taught her that," Maria whispered harshly, elbowing Alex.  _I suppose she's talking about Angelica's seduction tactics,_ Alex thought.  _Angelica'll be able to fucking destroy Jefferson without that, but the more the better._ He smiled, leaning back and crossing his arms, and watched the debate unfold.

Angelica did really fucking wonderful, hitting all of her points while unnerving Jefferson with precisely planned hair flips and eye batting. Maria never looked so proud. John looked really proud as well. At the end of her speech, they were all blown away with how well she  _decimated_ Jefferson. They already won, and Jefferson didn't even speak yet.

"We'll, um, reconvene after a brief recess," Washington said. Angelica stepped haughtily off of the podium, meeting her friends. 

"How the fuck," John told her.

"What's with all the flirting," Alex asked at the same time. 

Maria just went up to her, grabbed her face, and kissed her. 

"Hey guys," Lafayette said, snapping their fingers in front of them. "Get your shit together, I for one do not want to see you guys fuck each other right now."

Angelica flipped him off, and said to John, "It's my pastime to destroy fuckboys. Jefferson has high levels of fuckboyery. You too, Alex, be lucky that you're not dead."

Alex rolled his eyes. "The flirting?"

"Oh yeah, that." She looked at Maria lovingly. "She taught me that," she said, and nudged her. "No, but it's the art of seduction, you know? Cool stuff."

Washington called for the debate to resume, and Jefferson spoke his part. Very quietly. Basically no one could hear him.

Alex's party won that debate.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

"Dueling is an old tradition that dates back ages, to when Hogwarts was first founded."

The Revolutionary Crew were at the dueling club, this time including Peggy and Hercules. (They were dragged there by Eliza. Apparently the two were causing trouble by setting off fireworks around the halls. Peggy only brought up the idea of joining clubs so that she and Herc would be able to get more time to cause trouble together without fearing Eliza reprimanding them, so yeah Eliza dragged them there.) The two looked incredibly bored, whispering to each other. Alex overheard Peggy say, "Hey, at least we'll learn how to murder people correctly in this class." 

Washington was teaching it. He stood on this long table, surrounded by first years. 

"So, to properly duel, you must first learn the ten duel commandments. The first is to demand satisfaction. That's why you're actually dueling. If your opponent apologizes, no need for further action. Second, if you don't reach a peace, that's all right. Grab some pistols and a doctor on sight."

"What's with all the rhyming," Alex muttered to John. He shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe it's like in a song or something so that it's easier to remember, and Wash can't sing for his fucking life."

Lafayette snickered from behind them. "He may not be able to sing, but he sure sings in bed-"

"Oh my god don't you even," Alex said, slapping their arm playfully.

"Pay him in advance, treat him civilly, have him turned around so he could have deniability," Washington continued, oblivious to their joking. "Four. Duel before the sun is in the sky. Pick a place to die where it's high and dry. Six. Leave a note for your next a kin, tell them where you've been. If you're religious, pray that hell or heaven lets you in. Seven. Confess your sins, brace yourself. Eight. Last chance to negotiate. Send in your second see if they can set the record straight."

"Yeah, the only thing about me that's straight," John murmured to Alex. 

"Number nine. Look them in the eye, aim no higher. Summon all the courage you require, then count one two three four five six seven eight nine, number ten paces fire."

"I guess it is a song," Alex said. 

"Ok, so now that you know the fundamentals, let's actually try it. Can I get some volunteers? Um, Burr. Alex. Up on the table, you two are dueling."

The two climbed onto the long table, facing each other at the center.

"Alexander."

"Aaron Burr, sir!"

"Can we agree that duels are dumb and immature?"

"You already said that, but sure!"

"And please. Stop rhyming my name."

Alex shrugged, smiling. 

"Ok, guys, let's go," Washington said, urging them to actually duel. He clapped Alex on the shoulder. "Make me proud son."

 Alexander, in fact, did not make Washington proud. He and Burr went through their paces, Burr turning around immediately and stunning Alex, while Alex, for some reason, raised his wand to the sky. 

"You idiot," Alex heard Angelica say. 

Washington stepped back onto the table. "Um, ok, that went well," he said with no conviction. "Let's partner up, and practice disarming spells on each other."

The students wandered around, seeking their friends. You could hear the company scream in chaos at each other.

"You wanna go? Ok, let's go," Alex said to John, leading him and his friends out of the mess that was dueling club.

"I like to say that our adventures clubbing had been a huge success," he heard Peggy say triumphantly from behind him.

"You only wanted us to go clubbing so that you and your boyfriend could go around making trouble!" Eliza said to her.

"Like I said, _a huge success,"_ Peggy said smugly. "We still have those fireworks hidden around right?"

"Yup," Hercules said. Lafayette overheard them.

"Yall are freaks."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there is no order for when i update.  
> none.  
> i can update consecutively or i can update one chapter after four weeks of cliffhanger.  
> get used to it


	13. quidditch(again because i cant stop using quidditch games as major plot events to move the story forward)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so i learned how to write smut
> 
>  
> 
> i feel uncomfortable
> 
>  
> 
> i strongly advise you to skip this entire chapter tyvm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so i was reading this book bout ham and tj (it was about their rivalry ok dont call me out for fraternizing with the enemy but now i know way more bout tj then i should) and i said aham had slaves  
> and i researched and schuyler sisters had slaves  
> and what do i do i cant worship them with every fiber of my human bean help me  
> AND I CANT BELIEVE BETSY IS LEAVING WHYYYYYYY

"Hey so I heard that Seabury's gonna referee the next match."

The Revolutionary Crew were at lunch, having a great time until Angelica decided to drop this bomb on them. Well, it was relatively passive news, but to the Gryffindors, it meant everything. Those over-competitive assholes.

John dropped his fork. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah," Angelica said. "I know what I'm talking about."

"Wait, who's playing next game?" John asked Lafayette.

They rolled their eyes. "Don't you ever pay attention? It's us versus Hufflepuff."

"Aren't their beaters really good?"

"Yeah, they're good," Angelica cut in. "And if me and Peggy have trouble beating them, you guys better watch out with a biased referee and all."

"Shit."

 

 

 

 

"Don't you fucking dare get hurt again," Alex said as he nipped John's ear. They were in one of those handy closets, having a quiet make out session. 

"Why," John said, grinning. He stretched out to make his neck more accessible to Alexander. "It worked out so well the last time."

"You asshole." He kissed his way along John's collarbone. "You almost gave me a heart attack."

"When? When I fell, or when you realized that I read that really embarrassing letter?" John let his hands roam around Alex's back, landing on his hips.

"Oh, don't talk about that," Alex said, moaning into John's neck. 

"Hey, I almost died of second hand embarrassment," John protested. His breath hitched when Alex started sucking at his jaw. 

"You motherfucker."

"So are you the mother, then?"

Alex looked up at him, incredulous. "I can't believe you just- that joke, John- are you standards for humor that low? Actually, you know what, come here-" Alex said, and pulled John into a searing kiss. 

John leaned into it, opening his mouth. He scraped his tongue over Alex's teeth, positively devouring him.

They were getting quite into it, when they heard footsteps, and jumped apart.

"Oh shit," Alex whispered, with a ghost of a smile on his face. 

"We should probably get to class, huh."

"You think?" The two cleaned themselves up, and exited the closet, slightly disheveled. Outside, Lafayette was pacing around.

"There you are," they said to them with a bemused expression. 

"Sorry, I was, um, doing things," John stuttered. He elbowed Alex before he could reply with the predictable  _I'm things_ comment.

Lafayette looked at him with a knowing look. "Really, hmm?" They walked past them, running a hand down the grain of the door wood. "I like this closet. One of me and George's favorites." They winked.

Alex choked. "Oh my god."

 

 

 

 

The game started off well. Gryffindor scored first, while John and Lafayette distracted the Hufflepuff beaters. John looked really really good hitting bludgers. 

After a while, Gryffindor caught the snitch. Seabury being referee was surprisingly unimportant. Gryffindors won fairly, John looking happy and sweaty and positively glowing.

Alex knew very little about quidditch. Very little. But he did know that the quidditch players had a locker room somewhere, and he knew that he needed to find John and make out with him because John playing quidditch was one of the hottest things Alexander had ever seen.

He eventually found the locker room. It was relatively small and empty. He walked down the halls, and found John, shirtless. 

"Hey," John said to him, smiling. "What are you doing here?"

"Well," Alex said, swallowing. "I came to congratulate you. Anyone else in here?"

"No, they either change stupid fast, or prefer not to change in here? Why?"

"So I could do this," Alex said, and then basically leaped onto him. Alex frantically kissed John, finally able to release the desires he felt while watching him play.

"What's this for?" John murmured, smiling.

"Do you know how hot you look while playing quidditch?" He resumed attack John's mouth.

"No?"

"Well, you look really fucking hot. And you basically secured the house cup for us. And-"

"No we didn't," John said.

"Well, whatever. I need to relieve my sexual frustrations, do you know how hard it is to hide a boner while wearing wizarding robes?" 

John laughed, throwing his head back. "We probably shouldn't do this in somewhere, so open." He gestured vaguely. 

"Well we are totally doing this so let's go find a closet."

 

 

 

 

"Come on, come on, come on!" 

Alex was leading John throughout Hogwarts, trying to find a nondescript closet to make out in. So far, no success. 

"We can always go back to our dorm, you know," John told him as they were rounding a corner. 

"No, Laf might walk in on us," Alex said as he looked around hall.

"Oh, so you really want to-"

"Yes please."

The hall was empty, sexual frustrations high. The two paced through the hallway. Alex through his hands up in the air. "Why can't I just find a room so I can- oh."

As he was talking a room just magically appeared. It had a large, welcoming door. Alex looked at John, who shrugged. Alex grabbed his hand, and pulled him in the room.

Inside was a large bed. Along the walls were several nondescript cabinets. There were candles floating around. Lots of candles, like it was the room of a lesbian fictional character, in one of those muggle shows that Alex's friends back in the Caribbean watched, who was unnecessarily killed off for shock value. It was all very sexual.

Alex looked at John. He shrugged. "Oh well," Alex said, and promptly pinned John against the wall and began kissing him. He buried his hands into John's  hair. 

"Wait," John gasped, breaking off the kiss. "Where are we?"

Alex smiled. "Well, I when I was going to get food after hours-"

"When you starved yourself and decided that you should finally eat?"

"Yeah. That. So I overheard from the house elves that there's a room that pops up when someone in need _needs_ it. I guess this is the room."

"We're not in need." John frowned, making air quotes with the "in need" part.

"Well, not in the way you're thinking, but I really need to make out with you so here we are." 

John laughed. "I can't believe Hogwarts supplied us with a whole room to do whatever we want in here."

Alex smiled, responding by kissing John. John opened his mouth, and Alex started grinding against him. 

John moaned. "Oh, so we're doing this now."

"Fuck yes we are doing this now," Alex said, and started trailing kisses down John's neck. "You don't know how many times I thought of this."

"That's so you." John placed his hands into Alex's hair. "Oh baby girl, you feel so good."

At that, Alex choked. John looked down at him, worried. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Alex gasped out. "Do that again."

"Do what?"

"Baby girl."

Realization dawned on John's face, and he smirked. "Maybe later."

"You asshole," Alex said, and then resumed to kissing John. After a while of frantic kissing and grinding, John pulled Alex onto the bed. 

They flopped onto the bed, Alex on top of John. Alex giggled. 

"You are so cute," John said absentmindedly. 

"Yeah, well you-" Alex waved his hand around. "Have freckles. So you shut up about me being cute."

John laughed, and pressed a soft kiss to Alex's lips. Alex tapped at John's robes. "Take this off for me?"

"You take yours off," John said with a smirk. 

"I asked first!"

"You are such a child sometimes," John said, and proceeded to take Alex's robes off for him. He shed his own robes as well. 

And there they were, naked except for plain boxer briefs, laying on some random bed in a mysterious room which they both knew very little about. If someone walked in on them they're be screwed. So, naturally, they took things to the next level.

Alex placed himself on top of John, and looked down on him, and just looked at John and his freckled goodness. John squirmed under Alex's scrutiny. 

"Aleeexx," he whined. John grabbed at him. 

"Hold on, give me a minute," Alex said, holding his hand up. His eyes roved John's body, and finally landed on John's underwear. More specifically, the very visible cock underneath it. 

He looked at John with a hungered gaze. John smirked. "Well? Aren't you going to do something?"

"You shut up," Alex said, smiling. He leaned down, kissing John while grinding his cock against him.

"Mmm, baby girl, you feel so good." John moaned. Alex then proceeded to pull John's boxers down. He dropped them unceremoniously on the floor, and took John's cock in his hand. He thumbed over the slit. "Alex," he gasped. 

Alex smiled devilishly, ignoring how hard he was in his pants or the rapidly growing wet spot. "Can I suck your dick?" he asked bluntly. 

John looked at him, a big dumbstruck, but he nodded eagerly. Alex repositioned himself, so that he was lying on his stomach, in between John's legs. He took John's cock into his hand, pre-come already there, and licked at the tip. John gasped. "You're evil," he said. Alex smirked, and took John into his mouth. 

"Shit Alex!" he said, and then clapped a hand over his own mouth. "Fuck. I shouldn't be that loud." Alex took this as a challenge, swirling his tongue in every which way to evoke a reaction from John. Alex was having the time of his life.

Alex dug his tongue into the slit, tasting the liquid there, and moaned. "Alex!" John said, shouting. Alex took his mouth off of John's length with a soft pop. 

"Don't be that loud, my dearest," Alex said, smirking. 

"Yea, well stop being so good at sucking me off," John whispered harshly, and Alex laughed. And then took John into his mouth again. He felt John grasping at the sheets. 

Alex swirled his tongue around again, earning a thrust from John. "Oh shit," John said. "I shouldn't do that, huh."

Alex pulled himself of off John's cock, again. "You can do whatever you want, babe. I'm yours. And shut up, I need to suck your dick."

Alex put John's length into his mouth,  _again._ John began shallowly thrusting into Alex. 

"Oh, baby girl," he said. Alex hummed. "You're too good for me." He grabbed at Alex's hair. After a while, John was just basically fucking Alex's mouth. Alexander loved every second of it. And then Alex deep throated John, and John's cock touched the back of Alex's throat, and John just kinda came right there. Not that Alex minded.

Alex looked at John smugly, taking his mouth off of John's cock. And then he swallowed. 

John just looked at him, dumbstruck. "I- you, did- who gave you the right?" he finally pieced together. Alex smirked, kissing John and grinding against him.  _I should probably get my shit together,_ John thought,  _and treat him._

While they were kissing and grinding, John pulled down Alex's briefs. He threw them in some general direction, not caring where it went. "You treat me so well, baby girl," he said between kisses. "What can I do for you?" Alex moaned, not saying a word. John took Alex's cock into his hand, running his fingers down the length very lightly. The other hand he ran up and down Alex's inner thigh. He rolled them over, so that Alex was leaning against the headboard. 

"What do you want, baby girl?" John asked. "You can talk, you know." Alex wasn't being as vocal as usual, so he was under the assumption that he was keeping quiet to make the sexy times more sexy. 

And at that, a dam broke.

"Oh, fuck me, you- I need you- my dearest, John, John please, just fuck me," he babbled. 

"You're so fucking filthy," John said teasingly. 

Alex looked at him scathingly. "You just basically fucked my mouth, don't you be calling me filthy."

John laughed. "Come here," he beckoned, and resumed kissing and grinding on Alexander Hamilton. It was too much for Alex, and eventually he came all over them, his face reveling in ecstasy. 

"Oh well I guess maybe next time," Alex muttered, referring to his wish to be fucked by John Laurens. John laughed, grabbing an article of clothing from the floor, not caring whose it was. He cleaned them both up.

Alex squirmed under the blankets and gestured for John to follow. He traced little hearts over John's arm. "I love you," he whispered to him. 

"I love you too."

And so they were, under the sheets of a bed in Hogwarts in a room in which they knew nothing about, after having sex. So, naturally, instead of leaving, they stayed there. If anyone walked in on them, they'd be fucked. Well, more fucked than they were now. So, naturally, they cuddled for a while, let their guard down, and fell asleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> like i said, forget the fact that theyre 10 and fucking each other  
> i cringed so much while writing this  
> well cringed and gasped a lot because the idea that im writing gay smut about the founding fathers was too hilarious and ridiculous  
> and yes that was me shading the 100 in the middle of a porn scene get used to it


	14. *12 year old voice* ooooooooooooooo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> theyre in trou-ble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you know the way things are turning out it seems like i actually planned this whole entire fic from beginning to end before i actually wrote it  
> clarifiaction!: i did not

Alexander Hamilton usually never slept willingly. It would take Lafayette and Eliza’s scolding to get him to go to bed. So it was only natural for him to wake up in the middle of the night.

He was pressed against John’s bare chest. “Huh,” Alex groaned, and propped his head up on his arms.

Well, he tried. Because of the fact that he was basically using John as a pillow, he accidentally elbowed John in the stomach.

“Hey,” John said, waking up with a shout. “What the fuck.” And then John got his bearings, and saw Alex laying on him.

“Hey babe,” Alex said softly.

“Hey,” John said, sliding down and kissing Alex. “Why’d you stab me?”

Alex rolled his eyes. “Oh, that’s just like Burr, overdramatizing everything.” John only smirked, and just pulled Alex deeper into the kiss.

“As much as I would love to have morning sex,” Alex said, breaking them off. “It’s not even morning, and we should probably get back to our dorms.”

“Do we have to go back,” John said, stretching out. “We should just stay in here and fuck each other forever.”

“As much I would love to that,” Alex said, pressing kisses against John’s neck. “We should go back. I mean, what if Laf pulls an ‘Alex and John’ and go out in the middle of the night looking for us?”

“You have a point. But if you keep kissing my neck like that we aren’t gonna be able to do anything,” John said, smiling.

“Fine,” Alex said, pressing one last kiss against John’s clavicle. “Come on.”

He swung his legs over the bed, and walked around gathering his clothes. He picked up his pants, which were covered with some white stuff. He looked at John accusingly.

“What?” John said, throwing his hands up. “Did you want me to go around looking for a washcloth in the middle of your orgasm?”

Alex rolled his eyes. John smirked, and got dressed. “There’s probably something in the cabinets,” John told him.

“I guess,” Alex said, and proceeded to search the cabinets. John did so as well.

“Ah,” John yelped after a few moments.

“Hmm?” John pointed at the cabinet. Alex glanced over at it, and immediately looked away.

“I didn’t know that Hogwarts was so kinky,” Alex said.

“I will be forever scarred.”

After a while they found pants for Alex. After a long while because the two kept kissing each other. They were so in love it was gross.

They left the room, and closed the door. John stroked a hand down the wood grain. “The Room of Requirement,” he muttered.

“Did you name the room?” Alex asked him teasingly. He placed his arm around John’s hip and nosed his hair.

John blushed. “Yeah?”

“Well it’s not a bad name,” Alex said. “Come on, let’s go.”

The two made their way towards their dorm, exchanging cute little kisses along the way. They were very love drunk.

So love drunk, that they weren’t paying attention when they rounded a corner and promptly bumped into Professor Longbottom.

“Shi-Shoot,” Alex said. Professor Longbottom was holding a potted plant. No, not potted plant, that would be implying that the plant was harmless. The plant that he was holding was large, thorny, dark green, and looked like it would sell everyone to Satan for a single corn chip. It looked flat out illegal.

“Oh, hey, kids,” Professor Longbottom said, letting out an awkward smile. He readjusted his hold on the plant. “You um, shouldn’t be out at this time, but listen-“ he said, leaning in closer. “I shouldn’t either, so this never happened, ok?”

John and Alex were confused and very shocked, but they nodded. “Ok,” Alex whispered. And then they heard foot steps, and Professor Longbottom freaked out.

Longbottom pulled out his wand, muttered an incantation over the plant, which turned into a lopsided mouse. He put it into his pocket, and began scolding Alex and John.

“You two shouldn’t be out after hours,” he said. His eyes were apologetic. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you two detention.”

Alex and John were still very confused, but they nodded. It wasn’t like they could argue with a teacher. Well, they have countless of times before, but John and Alex liked and respected Professor Longbottom. And they didn’t want to be in any more trouble than they were in right now.

While Professor Longbottom was scolding them, Professor Seabury walked by them. _Oh, so that’s why he’s yelling at us,_ Alex thought. _If he didn’t punish us, Seabury would have given us a much worse punishment._ Seabury glanced at them, but he didn’t see anything wrong happening, so he walked past. Eventually, he was out of sight, and Professor Longbottom let out a sigh of relief.

“I’m sorry about that boys,” he said. “But I’m still going to have to give you two detention. Seabury’s gonna call me out if you’re not in trouble.”

Alex and John exchanged a look, but they shrugged. “Ok then?”

“Yea, well,” Longbottom said, and pulled out the mouse. He took his wand and turned it back into the plant. “Thank god that transfiguration went well,” he said. “I’m horrible at transfiguring things.” He clapped John and Alex on the back. “Go back to your dorms,” he said. “And don’t get into any more trouble.”

“Yes sir,” was John’s shaky reply. They walked away from Longbottom. Alex looked at John questioningly, and John replied with, “I don’t even know.”

Alex laid his head on John’s shoulder. “Was that worth getting in trouble for?”

“Well, the sex was,” John said, drawing a laugh from Alex. “But we should have just let Laf go after us.” Alex smiled. “What? It’s true! We go back to our dorm in case Laf goes after us and gets in trouble, and we’re the ones who get in trouble. This is what we get for being a good person.” Alex laughed.

They reached their dorms, and entered it quietly to not wake up Lafayette. Who wasn't even in their dorms that night.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

"You're an asshole."

The Revolutionary Crew were eating at breakfast, and Alex was being bitter about Lafayette not being in their dorms that night.

"I think we already established that, mon cher," Lafayette said, picking at their food. Alex rolled his eyes. "But what happened now?"

"Me and John got detention!" 

"For?"

"We were wandering around Hogwarts looking for you after hours."

Angelica snapped her fingers in front of Alex's face. "Alexander. Haven't you realized that when Laf is gone they and George are off in their sexual escapades?"

John and Alex blushed. Lafayette shrugged. "Well, she's not wrong."

Angelica smirked, and said, "Well where's George off to now?"

"He's off doing prefect stuff."

"Oh. You know," Angelica said, leaning in as to tell a secret. "They say he's got quite a big..... taxi."

 Alex raised his eyebrows.

"Ok," Lafayette said. "I don't want to know where you heard all that, but well, you're not wrong."

"I'm not sure I know what you mean," Eliza said. Angelica snapped her fingers in front of her face.

"'Liza. He's packing a stretch limousine," Angelica said.

"Tell me something I don't know," Laf said smugly. 

"Oh," Eliza said, understanding. She shrugged. "Well as long as he keeps it clean."

"Eh," Angelica said, half agreeing. "See, this shows how pure she is. You guys with the dirty minds-" She gestured towards Alex, John, and Lafayette. "And then there's 'Liza. Oh, Eliza, you're a cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure."

"What?" Eliza asked. 

"It's what the kids say," Angelica said dismissively.

"Angelica I'm younger than you!"

"I, for one," Peggy said, leaning in. "Love it."

"Ya'll are freaks."

 

 

 

 

"Again, I'm really sorry for making you guys do detention."

John and Alex were at Professor Longbottom's detention. Professor Longbottom kept stuttering and apologizing, it was getting kind of annoying for Alex.

"It's fine, it's fine," Alex said. He didn't want to make him feel bad. 

"So," John said, putting his hands in his pockets. "What are we doing?"

"Oh," Professor Longbottom said. "I was thinking, that we, um, just repot some plants. These aren't very dangerous. It's quite easy, frankly."

Alex and John followed Professor Longbottom's lead and began repotting the plants. Alex tried to create small talk. 

"So," he began. "What were you doing out in the middle of Hogwarts at night?"

"Oh!" Professor Longbottom said excitedly. "So I got this plant, right? Venemous Tentacula. Highly illegal."

John and Alex shared a look. John shrugged. Eh, he's seen weirder things. 

"Where'd you get it, sir?" John asked him. 

"Oh, I was at Hog's Head, grabbing a drink. I've been wanting to find this plant for a while, you know," Professor Longbottom rambled. Alex wasn't sure if he knew what he was saying. 

"Um, ok," Alex said.

"Yeah, and then, oh wait- I shouldn't be saying these things."

Alex shrugged halfheartedly. "It's ok?"

"Oh, just forget what I said, and, um, you're dismissed."

John shrugged, and they left.

"That was strange," he said.

"Yup."

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANDOHMYGODTHATWHITEHOUSECONCERTWASAMAZINGIWASSOUNPREPAREDITSLIKEGRAMMYNIGHTALLOVERAGAINBUTIDIDNTKNOWABOUTIMEANIKNEWTHATTHEYWEREGOINGTOTHEWHITEHOUSEANDPERFORMANDSHITBUTIDIDNTKNOWTHATTHEYLIVESTREAMEDITIWASATSCHOOLOKWHENIGOTHOMEANDPEOPLEWERELIKEOHMYGODIWASLIKEWHATTHEFUCKIFUCKINGMISSEDITBUTHENIFOUNDAVIDEOANDIMDEADYOUREREADINGTHEWORKOFACORPSECAUSELIKEDAVEEDWITHTHEHAPPINESSANDLINWITHTHEFUCKINGJEANSTHEFUCKINGJEANSOHMYGODANDANTHONYWASPUREANDPIPPAWASFUCKINGPERFECTANDOAKALMOSTKNOCKEDOVERHISMICANDLESLIEWASSOWELLDRESSEDANDILOVETHEMANDIAMBITTERTHATTHEYCUTOFFTHELIVESTREAMIMSOFUCKINGBITTERWEMISSEDSOMUCH  
> ANDTHENTHEREWASTHATINSTAGRAMPICKOFJAZZYANDANTHONYANDMYDEAREST,ANDOHMYGODANTHONYJUSTLOVESKILLINGUSANDTHENTHATHAM4HAMWITHTHEFEMALESANDSCHUYLERSISTERSANDIMSODEADRIGHTNOWYOUDONTEVENKNOW  
> ANDEMMASORTEDTHEMNOEMMAELIZAISNOTGRYFFINDORGETITRIGHTSHEISHUFFLEPUFFHUFFLEPUFFSUCHAHUFFLEPUFFOHMYGODEMMASHESISAHUFFLEPUFF


	15. shits going down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Though, in reviewing the incidents of my administration, I have realized that i should have probably fucking planned this out and now the ending is gonna be weird and fucked up 
> 
> whatever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jazz hands for porn that had to do something with the plot  
> not that theres porn in this chapter  
> im talking about like two chapters up
> 
> this is awkward  
> *jazz hands away*

"So how was detention?" 

Angelica, Alex, John, and Laf were walking back from debate club. Debate club became pretty wild, the members splitting into two groups: Democratic Republicans and Federalists. The Federalists won, of course, having Angelica on their team. 

Alex looked at Angelica quizzically. "Didn't we tell you about that already?"

John bumped Alex playfully. "She wasn't there the day after, remember?"

"Oh," Alex said, nodding understandingly. "Oh yeah, where were you?"

"I was.... with Maria."

"She was getting bizzay," Lafayette yelled from the side. Angelica slapped his arm. 

"But what did happen?"

Alex sighed, trying to remember it. It had been a while {im shit at pacing remember so just deal with long period of time k thx} since the detention actually happened. "So apparently Longbottom had an illegal plant-" Angelica let out a scandalized gasp. "Yeah. Apparently he wanted one for a long time. And then he went to this dark pub and got it. And then-"

"Wait," Angelica said, pausing in her tracks. "He wanted this plant."

"Mmmhmmm."

"And then this guy. Just shows up in the middle of a dark pub. With an illegal plant that he wanted."

Alex nodded again. "That seems about right."

"Doesn't that seem... a little off to you?"

The two boys and other shook their heads. "It seems perfectly fine," Alex reasoned.

"Oh my god you are all idiots," Angelica said, slapping a hand to her forehead. "Longbottom. Wanted this illegal plant forever. And then some stranger just shows up and gives it to him. In a dark pub. Strange?"

Realization dawned on Alex's face. "Oh shit...."

"Yeah." She turned around, towards the direction of Longbottom's office. "Come on."

The group ran towards Professor Longbottom's office. Angelica knocked on his door. "Excuse me? Excuse me, Professor Longbottom-"

The door opened. "Yes?" He looked at Angelica inquisitively. 

"Who gave you that illegal plant?" Angelica asked him bluntly. She held her hands in front of her innocently, with Alex, Laf, and John behind her. 

"Um, it was, um- I really can't tell you." 

Angelica's gaze sharpened, and she stepped forward, pressing a finger on the professor's chest. "Oh, I'm sure you can remember," she said in a sugary tone. "Wouldn't want the ministry to find out about this."

Alex, Laf, and John gaped behind her. After all, she was blackmailing a teacher.

Professor Longbottom backed up, flustered. "No, seriously, I really can't tell you, I didn't even see the guy's face. He was cloaked!" 

The boys and other behind Angelica would have thought that the scene before them was pretty funny, because, well, a Hogwarts teacher was being intimidated by a first year, but everybody was intimidated by Angelica Schuyler. 

"What do you remember?" Angelica said, leaning against the doorframe and looking at her nails. 

"Um, not much, we, he was giving me drinks, you see-" At that, Angelica looked at him sharply. "And, well, I told him a bit about Leafy-"

"Leafy was that devil plant?" Laf whispered to Alex, who nodded.

"And how to get pass him." 

"And how do you get pass him?"

"Oh, it's simple, just play some music, that calms him down."

"Thank you Mr. Longbottom," Angelica said boldly, stepping away from the door. "You are dismissed." Professor Longbottom stared shocked at her, as she closed the door. She turned to her friends, and gestured towards the third floor. "Come on, let's go."

"Where are we going?" Alex asked her. He made his way towards there, but he was still very confused.

"Someone's going after the philosopher's stone," Angelica murmured as they hurried towards there. 

"Care to elaborate?"

"Isn't it obvious? What's under the trapdoor that you guys found, ages ago, was the stone. Someone drugged Longbottom and weaseled information out of him on how to get past that plant. And now the stone's in danger, and we need to get to it as quickly as possible."

"How does that make so much sense and no sense at all at the same time?" John asked.

"I don't know, I get it," Laf murmured.

"Oh my god why didn't I think of that!" Alex exclaimed. 

"It's cause yall stupid," Angelica retorted. They hurried towards the third floor, passing Aaron Burr, who was walking by.

"Hey!" Burr yelled after them. "You guys can't go in the third floor!"

"Watch me," Alex yelled back, as Angelica was casting a spell to unlock the door to Leafy's hideout. The gang went into the room, and Burr ran in the room as well. 

"Stop," he gasped, bending over. "You, are, not, supposed, to be in the room." At last, he looked up, and saw a giant human eating plant in front of his face. 

"We didn't bring an instrument did we?" Alex whispered. There was a harp on the floor, far far away, which Alex was sure none of them knew how to play. Except for maybe Angelica, lord knows she could do anything. 

"Nope," John said back.

"Merde," Lafayette said. 

Angelica began to sing. Well, not sing, rap. "I've been reading Common Sense by Thomas Paine. Some men say that I'm intense, or I'm insane."

At that, the plant began to calm down. The boys, and other, looked at her incredulously. "You want a revolution, I want a revelation. So listen to my declaration: We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal. And when I meet Thomas Jefferson, I'm gonna compel him to include women in the sequel- WALK!" She rapped, and then yelled at the other guys for not doing anything when the plant was calm. 

"Did you just freestyle that?" Laf asked her as they tiptoed towards the trapdoor. Angelica nodded smugly. They got to the trapdoor, opened by John and Alex. They looked down into the darkness. 

"We're gonna have to jump down that aren't we?" Burr asked softly. 

"Yup," John replied.

"Welp," Alex said, straightening his spine. "Not it."

"Not it," Angelica's almost instant reply.

"Not it," John's reply, filled with amusement over how childish his boyfriend was.

"Not it," Lafayette's eager reply.

"Shit," Burr's reply when he realized that he was meant to go down first. He backed away slowly. "I'm just, gonna, you guys can, go ahead break the law-"

"Nope," Angelica said, grabbing him by the back of his jacket. She pushed him down the trapdoor. "Down the chute, flyboy."

Angelica sat down on the edge of it, proceeding to go next. "Shouldn't you guys be going first, I mean, you are Gryffindors," she said to them, and then dropped them. Lafayette rolled their eyes. They, too, went down as well, leaving Alex and John there. 

"Come on," John said, pressing a kiss to Alex's lips. "Let's go." He grabbed Alex's hand, and pulled him into the chute with him. They fell down a long way, and then landed, bouncing on some kind of green surface. It was very dark, and his friends were no where to be found.

John made a move to stand up, but immediately, he was pulled down by vines.  _Oh shit,_ he thought. He looked over, and Alex was struggling as well, being more caught in the vines than he was. He tried moving, but got entangled even more.

"Wait! I know what this plant is!" he heard Alex proclaim from next to him. "It's called the Devil's Snare-I know about it, I read about it in a book-"

"WE GET THAT YOU READ ALEX NOW CAN YOU GET US OUT OF HERE!" John heard Lafayette yell. 

"Yeah! So, um to make it stop, you have to light a fire, but I don't have a match-"

"ARE YOU NOT A WIZARD!" Angelica yelled. 

"Oh yeah." At that, Alex took out his wand with some difficulty, and lit a fire. The vines immediately went away, and John was able to see his friends again.

Immediately, Angelica strode over to Alex. "You're an idiot," she said, deadpanned. "Well, come on now, there's no going back. I'm talking to you, Burr."

Burr looked at Lafayette, as in asking  _Is she really like this?_ Lafayette just shrugged, and followed her through the door into the next room.

The next room was filled with keys flying around. Like, lots of keys just flying around. And then there was a big door, with a large key hole. And a broom was floating in the middle. Angelica looked around, analyzing the situation. 

"So," she said. "It appears to me that we have to find a key to get through the door."

"So where's the key?" Alex asked.

She gestured above her, as saying  _duh._ "We have to get this broom, and fly around and find a large key that stands out."

At the mention of the word broom, Alex and Burr stepped back. They were absolute shit at flying. John and Lafayette started arguing over who should do it.

"I should do it," John said. "I mean, I am the better flyer."

"No, I am," Lafayette retorted. 

"You only think you're the better flyer because you have the state of the art brooms."

"So do you!"

"Nuh uh, my parents can't afford them."

"Yes they can, they're fucking rich as fuck!"

"Yeah, but your family is richer!"

"No!"

"Lafayette you're basically fucking royalty."

"Not true."

"It is so true."

"Yeah, well you're super rich because your family used to be part of a huge house elf plantation." 

John let out a scandalized gasp. "Do not bring S.P.E.W. into this!"

"Why not?"

"It's not relevant!"

"Yes it is-"

"Guys," Angelica cut through. She snapped in front of their faces, and then proceeded to wave a very large very silver key in front of their faces.

"Whaaaa," Lafayette said.

"While you males and not male were arguing," she said. "I kinda stole the broom and found the key." She shrugged, and unlocked the door. She pulled it open dramatically. "Now, if you will please shut up over who is richer, obviously, I am, and enter the next room."

John met eyes with Lafayette and Alex, who both shrugged. Burr walked into the next room, scandalized. 

The next room was a huge chess board. Like really fucking huge. Like life size huge.  _Like John's dick huge,_ Alex thought.

Angelica surveyed the room. "We're supposed to fucking play chess. Come on, mount a chess piece, we have to play across the room."

Burr chose a bishop, John and Lafayette took a knight, and Alex went for the king. Angelica became the queen. "You can be the king but watch the queen conquer," she said to him, flipping her hair. 

And conquer she did. She ordered them around, viciously tearing apart the other side. They suffered many casualties on their side too, but no pieces that their friends were on. Laf, Burr, and John were moved around, and Angelica did a lot of the mauling of chess pieces herself. Alex hasn't moved since the game started. 

Things were going pretty good, meaning Angelica was slaying, until things weren't going pretty good. As in, in order to win, Angelica had to be sacrificed. 

"Hey, guys, so, I'm gonna, like die, ok?" she called out to them. 

"No, what the fuck no way," Alex yelled from his perch on the king. 

"No, not literally," Angelica elaborated. "But the queen needs to die so that we can win."

"NO, Angelica! No," Lafayette yelled. 

"Good luck trying to make it through the next rooms without me," she yelled.

"Angelica, don't you dare-"

Angelica shrugged. "Fuck it-" she said, and then moved her queen in position. The marble queen got smashed, but Angelica got off pretty okay. Meaning she lay there unconscious. 

The rest of them jumped off of their characters. "Do you think she's-" Burr asked hesitantly, but Alex cut him off.

"There is no way Angie is dead she's too good for that."

"Dude," Lafayette said. "If she hears you call her Angie one more time she's gonna murder you in your sleep. Dead or alive, she's gonna slit your throat."

Alex rolled his eyes, and headed into the next room. And let out a surprised "eep!"

In the room was an unconscious troll. John patted Alex's back. "Real manly of you there," he said. Alex stuck his tongue out. 

They crept past the room, and entered the next one. In the middle of the room was a table, with seven bottles on it. The group reached the table, and black flames sprung up in front of them and purple behind them.

"Woah," John said, reaching to touch the fire. "Cool."

"No, no, no," Lafayette said, tackling his arm. He pointed at John. "Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Suicidal recklessness." 

"Woah, guys, look at this," Alex exclaimed from the table. He was holding a piece of paper. "There's a riddle on this!"

Burr looked around. "Well, I'm assuming that one of those potions can get us through the flames."

"Yeah, that's what the riddle says," Alex said. And then he threw the sheet of paper in the flames. 

"WHAT'D YOU DO THAT FOR!" Burr yelled. Alexander shrugged. 

"I'd read about these," he said arrogantly. "I'll be able to figure out which is which."

"Oh my god," Lafayette said, sitting down. "Angelica was right, we'll be able to get nothing done and we're gonna be stuck here and die."

"Chillax," Alex said. He sauntered over to the table with the potions, took one good look at all of them, and then said "Fuck."

Lafayette groaned even louder. "I might as well just go through the flames to get Angelica to save all of our asses."

John was sitting on the side, messing with the fire. In all, they were a mess.

"Come on Alexander," Burr said, gesturing towards the table. After a while (a really long time), they were able to figure out which ones let them go through the flames.

Alex held up the bottle triumphantly. "Aha!" he said. Lafayette stood up, and grabbed the bottle.

"There's only enough for three of them," they said.

"Oh shit."

"Is there one that lets you go back?"

And then Burr and Alex argued for another while (another really long time), and found the bottle for that. 

Lafayette grabbed it, and downed it. They walked through the flames. "You guys deal with that shit," they said. "I'm going back to Angelica."

Alex shrugged. The three split the potion, and carried on into the next room.

Inside, they found one of their teachers. Charles Lee.

"I HATE YOU," Alex immediately yelled at him. 

"Alex," Burr said, patting his arm. 

"Babe, that was pretty fucking reckless, even for my standards," John whispered in his ear. 

"What?" Alex asked, shrugging. "He's committing a crime, as we speak. I guess that I get to yell my profanities now without getting in trouble."

"Well, yea, sure, but like-"

"Boys," Burr cut in. 

"Sorry," they mumbled. 

"So you're the one who wanted to steal the stone," Alex said to Lee accusingly. Lee stopped his evil disney villain pacing, and nodded.

"Yup.... seems about right."

"Why?"

"It's for the Dark Lord, you idiot."

"Who's the dark lord he's talking about?" Alex whispered to John.

"I'm pretty sure it's you-know-who," he whispered back. 

"Who is?"

"King George, duh."

Alex noticed the Mirror of Erised in the middle of the chamber. "Hey why is that there?" he wondered out loud.

"It's the key to getting the stone," Lee said, pausing to stroke the mirror carefully. Kinky.

"How?"

"Well, you're the key, apparently. But I don't know why that would be, since you're nothing more than the bastard brat of a Scottish peddler-"

"YOU BASTARD," Alex yelled, and lunged forward to attack Lee. And tripped. And sprained his ankle. "Ow," he whined, cradling his foot. John crouched down, and tended to him.

"You ok? You didn't break anything, that's just sprained-"

"No I'm not ok, my honor is wounded." John rolled his eyes.

"What, do you want me to duel him or something?"

"Actually, that's a pretty good idea. We stall, for when Laf and Angie get back, and my honor is returned." 

John petted Alex's hair lovingly. He stood up, and boldly proclaimed, "I challenge you to a duel, Mr. Charles Lee."

"What! No, you can't do that," Burr said. "He's a teacher, for goodness sakes-"

"He's working for you-know-who-"

"Yeah, but-"

"I accept," Lee said from across the room. "Burr, you are my second."

John turned around, and looked down on Alex. "I mean, I guess you're my second? Well, you're the only other guy in the room, so...."

Burr was still trying to get them to stop. "No, John, you can't do this, you might die. Or worse. Expelled."

John chuckled, and pushed Burr away. "It's fine, I got this." He pulled out his wand, and took off his jacket. "Hold this for me?" he said, tossing it to Alex.

 _Kiss his ass baby I got yo jacket_ , Alex mouthed at him, giving him a thumbs up. John and Lee started. They had Burr count their paces.

"One two three, I can't believe I have to count out loud for you guys, four five six, this is highly illegal and someone is going to die, seven eight nine TEN PACES FIRE."

Lee was the one that got hurt, on the side. Burr rushed over, and pressed his hand against Lee's wound. 

"I can't believe I lost to a first year," Lee muttered. 

"Sir, shhh, conserve your strength," he said. 

"Lee do you yield?" Alex asked from the floor. 

"You shot him in the side yes he yields!" Burr yelled exasperatedly. 

"I'm satisfied," John said. 

"We should probably get out of here," Alex said. 

And at that, teachers and important people who totally had the power to expel them for just about doing anything came into the chamber. 

Alex looked at them helplessly. 

"Shit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why the fuck why the fuck WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE NO HERCULES PEGGY FICS GUYS COME ON THE ONLY ONE IS MINE AND THEY ARENT EVEN SHOWCASED  
> and now because of that  
> im gonna dump a bunch of herc/peggy headcanons on you  
> and probably write all the fics for that ship  
> peggy and herc would be such a power couple  
> like peggy would be good at hacking into things and being smol  
> and they would like track ppl down for u for a fee  
> theyd be the ultimate spy couple  
> and theyd be like andy and april from parks and rec  
> super whimsical and cute and millennial  
> herc would make peggy a bunch of dresses and she loves wearing them around  
> OH OH OH  
> like tailor herc and peggy would be his model  
> he would make her a dress and she would show it off and herc is like oh youre too cute and hed start kissing her and everything  
> peggy is super bitter about being super smol and herc would just tease her  
> peggy would be the one to assassinate a guy on their missions and herc would be like thats my bby girl  
> yea kick his ass bby girl i got yo flower  
> JUST MORE HERC/PEGGY OK PLEASE AND THANK YOU


	16. well this one is just an utter piece of shit lmao

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> starts where we left off, i have no idea why i split that last chapter into two ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> i have no idea what im doing remember  
> i think this is second to last chapter? i think  
> but theres like one or two more
> 
> its funny how i took so so long to write such a short piece of shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two people have commented me on my notes now and now i feel like i have set this high standard for my notes and now they must all be intricately crafted and shit i shouldnt have set standards for you guys

Alexander watched as an influx of teachers poured themselves into the chamber. Headmistress McGonagall, and a bunch more. Lafayette was there too, with Angelica who looked surprisingly conscious. Angelica and Laf walked over to Alex, who was laying on the floor, while the teachers rushed towards Lee and Burr.

"Why are you on the floor?" Angelica said as a greeter, poking Alex with her foot. 

"I have suffered a mortal wound," Alex said dramatically. Lafayette crouched down.

"You sprained your ankle didn't you," they said, amused.

"Shhhh," Alex fake whispered. "If you tell _her_ that," he said, referring to Angelica. "I'll never hear the end of it."

Angelica rolled her eyes, and looked around the chamber where John and Burr were being interrogated by the professors. "What happened?"

"Lee and John got into a duel."

"Why?"

"John was defending my honor."

Lafayette sat down next to Alex. "Mon ami, that is one of the stupidest and most reckless things you two have ever done." Alex shrugged.

Angelica crouched down. "I agree with them, and they told me about how you threw away that scroll. Is there _any_ other reason why you dueled Lee?"

Alex bit his lip, thinking it over. "Well, you see, Lee was provoking me. And so I lunged to fight him, and I kinda tripped and fell and sprained my ankle."

"The great Alexander Hamilton, taken down by gravity!" Lafayette said dramatically. Alex slapped their arm.

"Lee was also talking about treason or something, but-"

"Why didn't you say that first!" Angelica said, throwing her hands up in the air.

"Because he's an idiot," they reminded her. Angelica shrugged, agreeing.

"Yeah, Lee was trying to get the philosopher's stone," Alex continued. "Apparently, it was for you-know-who for some weird reason-"

At that, Headmistress McGonagall rushed over to the three of them, accompanied by John.  

"What is going on her," she said exasperatedly. "Mr. Hamilton, why are you on the floor."

"I... sprained my ankle?"

"Then why didn't you just use a healing spell?"

"Damn," Lafayette muttered from next to Alex. 

"Ms. Schuyler, may you please.... aide Mr. Hamilton in healing his ankle. Mr. Lafayette, please come with me and Mr. Laurens. We need to talk." Angelica nodded, and took out her wand. She quickly muttered the incantation, healing Alex's ankle, but not before saying under her breath, "You prideful idiot."

Alex lept up, and sauntered over to where Lafayette, John, and McGonagall were talking. "You tell me all the time!" he called after Angelica, who rolled her eyes and followed him. 

"So," he said confidently. "What happened."

"Professor Lee will be put in captivity until we can confirm that he was, in fact, working for you-know-who. We've sent some people to search Lee's office-"

"Who are you sending?" Alex interrupted. McGonagall gave him a leveled look. 

"We sent Professor Seabury and Professor Longbottom-"

"No," Lafayette said. "Lee isn't stupid. If he was communicating with you-know-who, he would have hid it away. You should probably send Peggy and Hercules instead, they know what they're doing."

"And why," McGonagall said. "Would I send two first-years to investigate a crime, which really should be taken up by the Ministry?"

"I'll vouch for them," Angelica said. 

"Fine," McGonagall said. "You have my... permission. I'm going to have to talk to all of you later though," she said, and started walking away, towards Lee. "But now I'm going to have to deal with this idiot of a professor...."

Burr walked up to the three of them. "Did I kill him?" John asked cheerfully, bouncing on the tips of his toes. 

"No," Burr said, disgusted. "He got hurt in the side. And you look way too happy about that."

"Not fair," Lafayette said, stomping their foot like a six year old. "Why wasn't I in the room where it happened!"

"Laf," Alex said. "You were literally like fuck this shit I'm out, and then fucking left us." 

"And trust me," Burr added. "For once, you wouldn't have wanted to be in the room where it happened. Now there's all this drama," he said, sighing. 

Angelica rolled her eyes. "The reason there is all of this  _drama,_ is because you guys can't do anything correctly." She turned, and headed towards the exit. "Now, I don't know about you, but I'm going to go and find Herc and Peggy so that we can settle this shit."

And so the children left, and headed out of the chambers. It took them quite a while, Angelica watching the boys and Lafayette scrambling over each other, trying to get out of the trapdoor chute, for like twenty minutes, and laughing. And then she walked over and performed a simple spell getting them all out of there. 

The Revolutionary Crew and Burr split ways, Alex teasingly yelling an overly flirtatious "You'll be back!" at Burr as they parted ways. Angelica rolled her eyes, and herded the rest of them towards the Hufflepuff common room.

"Why are we going there?" Alex said as he was pushed towards the common room.

"Cause I'm sick of being the mom friend and 'Liza knows how to do it for hours without murdering each and every one of you. Oh, and she probably knows where Peggy is."

"How come I'm not the mom friend?" Laf asked. Angelica shot him an  _are you serious_ look.

"I got unconscious for  _five minutes,_ and somehow, you guys manage to shoot a teacher and unravel a treason conspiracy, sprain your ankle, and almost get  _burnt,_ John. What was that! Laf told me how you tried to touch that fire thing, that was one of the stupidest things I've ever heard, and I'm friends with all of you guys."

"How do you even know where the Hufflepuff common room is?" John asked as he tried to keep up with Angelica, who just shot him another look. The crew rounded a corner, and promptly bumped into Eliza. 

"Oh hey guys!" she said cheerfully. She noticed that they were all panting from running (well, except Angelica, she's perfect). "What's wrong? Is it about the thing that sent all of the teachers down to wherever?" 

"Yeah," Alex said breathlessly. "Um, where's Peggy and Herc?"

Eliza frowned. "Actually, I have no idea."

"Maybe we should split up to try and find them?" Alex suggested. 

"And do the white people in a horror movie thing? Nah man," Angelica said. 

Lafayette laughed. "We're not in a horror movie, mon cher."

Angelica rolled her eyes. "Fine."

 

 

 

 

 

 

They did find Peggy and Hercules later. They, meaning Lafayette, who found them in a indiscreet closet, doing things that Lafayette would not disclose. The rest of the group then met up at the Great Hall. 

"What is going on, we were doing something," Peggy complained. Alex rolled his eyes. 

"Look," he drawled. "We need you to infiltrate Lee's room." Hercules frowned, and folded his arms.

"What do you mean? We did that  _ages_ ago."

Eliza looked up, scandalized. "Peggy!" she scolded. 

Peggy shrugged. "We were bored. And hey, it was worth it. Lee leads a  _very_ scandalous life," she said, sharing a sly look with Herc. 

Angelica sighed, cupping her face with her hand. "Look, can you just get us any correspondents that may seem, I don't know,  _treasonous?"_

"Oh yeah!" Peggy said, straightening her spine. "Lee works for you-know-who!"

At that, the entire Revolutionary Crew excluding the two of them, groaned, and covered their eyes in exasperation. 

"And,  _when_ did you find out about this?" Angelica asked. Peggy and Herc exchanged a look. 

"Um, when were Slytherin quidditch tryouts?" Herc asked. The rest of them groaned again. 

"Why didn't you tell us?" Angelica continued. 

"We didn't think it was important?" Herc said uneasily. 

"We were preoccupied at the time," Peggy said. "And then we just kinda forgot about it?"

Angelica ran a hand down her face. "Ok, ok, whatever, it's fine. Can you just go and get those correspondents?"

"Yes sir!" Peggy said perkily, and grabbed Herc's hand and ran off. 

"Wow," Washington said after that was all over. "You guys are all a mess."

 

 

 

Peggy and Hercules did have traitorous correspondents, which Alex and John sent up to McGonagall. She accepted them gratefully, and then shooed them out to deal with that mess. 

Later, she called Laf, John, Angelica, Alex, and Burr into her office. "I feel like I owe you guys an explanation," she said. "After all, you did just kinda save us all." She passed around a clipboard, gesturing for each of them to sign it. "What I am about to tell you five is  _extremely_ confidential. And since I can't have you guys blubbering about it everywhere," she said, with a pointed look at Alexander. "You guys have to sign this, so that if you do spill, I will be able to ruin your life." Angelica laughed, and McGonagall casted a fond look in her direction.

"So," McGonagall continued. "Lee will be sent to Azkaban." Alex and John grinned wickedly. "Apparently, he  _was_ communicating with you-know-who. He was working for him, working to bring the stone to you-know-who."

"Why does he need the stone?" Alex interrupted. McGonagall looked at him.

"I was getting to that, Mr. Hamilton. You-know-who need it, for some sort of funding. But the fact that Lee was corresponding with you-know-who is enough reason for him to be sent to Azkaban."

"How come it took you so long to figure this out?" Angelica asked. "I mean, us students figured it out before you guys did."

"Well, me? I trusted him. Enough that I was pretty sure he wasn't committing treason. And besides, Ms. Schuyler, you students only figured this out when you were invading his privacy."

"Damn," Laf muttered.

"Where is the actual stone though?" Burr asked. McGonagall smiled grimly.

"Don't worry about that, we've destroyed it."

"Oh."

"Well," she said, sighing. "I think that it is safe to assume that you five are all caught up now. Dismissed."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have no idea why i went the kinda historical route i just did ok let me be  
> and i love how i just kinda glazed over the actual overall story arc thing lmao still havent really really really thought it out yet lmao  
> also i listened to clpping (finally idk why i took so long) and i s2g is i hear daveed talk about sex (or anything tbh) again im just gonna have to kill myself
> 
>  
> 
> this is future me and i listened to their first album and i think i might have hearing damage


	17. teach me how to say goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> started off with a kinda formal i guess chapter title, figured that i should end with one
> 
>  
> 
> ok WHY THE FUCK DOES THAT SOUND SO DEPRESSING THIS CHAPTER IS JUST GONNA BE LIKE ALL THE OTHER ONES OK ITS GONNA BE SHITTY AND SHITTY JOKES AND SHITTY WRITING AND SHIT OK NOW I FEEL BUMMED OUT JESUS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hillary clinton is taking away our faves one by one  
> first it was chris  
> and now renee  
> and ari too  
> come back to the light side

Alexander's time at Hogwarts was almost over. Almost. There was still some things to do.

McGonagall called Alex into her office, just to basically tell him that if he fucks up again he would be expelled. 

The crew went through final exams. They all did well according to their standards (Read: according to their standards, meaning a passing grade would be a celebratory cause). Alexander, unpredictably, stayed up the whole night consecutively for days, studying and cramming to get the perfect score. John would join him, just watching him work, and doing some other stuff that he and Alex really shouldn't be doing in such open spaces. It would take a weary Lafayette to drag them to bed, muttering "If Eliza were here she'd have all yall asses."

Exams weren't too bad. Alexander, evidently, did not get a perfect score. (He did get pretty damn close though, those scores that makes you want to punch a wall because  _goddammit, if I didn't do this one stupid thing, I would have gotten a perfect score, and I hate everything.)_

When he did get his results, he was in his dorm hanging out (Read: making out) with John Laurens. The first thing he did when he read his results was scream, go punch a wall, and yell into the void, "I HATE EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD INCLUDING MYSELF."

"Shhh," John said, patting his back gently. "Chill Alex." He pressed a kiss to the top of his head. "Look, baby girl. You only got like one wrong."

"That's why I'm so _mad_ ," Alex responded.

John rolled his eyes, and showed Alex his results, which made Alex feel a bit better. "Ok, I hate everything in this world, including myself, except for you John Laurens." John chuckled, and resumed kissing Alex.

(Angelica did get a perfect score. Actually, she got quite more than a perfect score, getting extra credit and therefore got a better score than everyone. Alexander screamed when he heard this.)

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

The Revolutionary crew chatted animatedly while shoveling food in their mouth at the end of the term feast. Despite all of the happiness, the squad's mood was somewhat subdued due to the fact that they were all leaving for summer break in a few days. A while, after some shitty jokes and endless teasing, McGongall, up on the teacher's table, rose up to deliver a speech.

"Another year, gone. And now, as I understand it, the house cup needs awarding. And the points stand thus. In fourth place, Gryffindor, with 312 points. Third place, Hufflepuff, with 332 points. Second place, Ravenclaw, with 426 points. And in first place, with 472 points, Slytherin house."

"We're gonna win the cup," Herc whispered.

"No," Alex whispered back. "Me, Laf, and John uncovered Lee's douchebaggery so we're gonna get points for that and win."

"Yes, well done Slytherin," McGonagall continued, ignoring the loud clapping coming from the Slytherins. "However, recent events must be taken in account. And I have a few last minute points to award. To Mr. Alexander Hamilton and John Laurens, 25 points each for uncovering Lee's treason." John and Alex grinned and high-fived. "To the Lafayette, 25 points for aiding them in finding Lee. To Mr. Aaron Burr, 25 points for helping them as well. And to Ms. Angelica Schuyler, 75 points for having to deal with them and helping uncover a treason at the same time. Lord knows you have patience to do those simultaneously." At that, the entire hall erupted. 

"WHAT THE FUCK ANGELICA," Alex screamed. John and Laf looked confused and pissed at the same time. Eliza clapped Angelica proudly on the back, and Peggy did a little dance.

"Excuse me, excuse me," McGonagall yelled, drawing attention to her again. "Now, I understand that Ravenclaw has been put in the winning position, but I am not yet done. For, I am taking away 10 points from Ravenclaw and Slytherin each for the invasion of a professor's privacy," she said, with a pointed look at Peggy and Herc. "Now, according to my calculations, Ravenclaw wins the house cup!"

At that, the hall erupted yet again. There was yelling, clapping, and a lot of yelling from where the Revolutionary Crew were sitting. Mainly from Alexander.

"GODDAMMIT ANGELICA," he shouted. Angelica smirked. 

"Hey," Eliza chided. "Don't blame her for being perfect."

Alexander rolled his eyes.

"I hate you all. Well except for John." John rolled his eyes. "This family is so toxic," he continued as he shoveled more food into his face. 

And so they continued, joking around like that, until the feast was over. And then they sadly split ways. 

John and Alex headed toward their dorms. Well, headed, because halfway there Alex grabbed John's hand and pulled them into a room. The room. You may recall.

"Oh, Alex," John breathed when he realized that they were in that room where they could do whatever the fuck they wanted. Alex grinned, and promptly pinned John to the wall, kissing him forcefully. 

"You didn't think I would say goodbye without feeling you one last time," he whispered in his ear. John moaned, and stretched out his neck, allowing Alexander to kiss his neck easier. 

"I don't know what I expected," John said, rolling his hips up into Alex's. Alex moaned, grinding into John even harder. He craned his neck and kissed John on the lips even harder, slipping his tongue into John's mouth and just  _tasting._

"Oh, baby girl," John moaned, grabbing Alex's ass. "Bed, bed now." Alex detached himself from John, quickly led him to the bed. He pushed John down, and climbed on top of him, planting his mouth on John's.

After a while of fervent kissing and grinding, John tapped at Alex's clothes. "Baby girl, take these off for me," he said breathlessly. 

"Yes yes yes yes," Alex babbled, and took off his clothes, and helped John shed his as well. 

"Babe you're so beautiful," Alex said, tracing patterns onto John's skin. John smiled. 

"What do you want to do Alexander?" he asked slyly. The look in his eyes was simply obscene. 

"Oh fuck," Alex swore softly. He placed a soft kiss on John's lips, and rested his forehead against John's. "I want you to fuck me," he said. "Fuck me, John.  _Fuck,_ make me yours." 

John responded by kissing him languidly. "Anything for you, baby girl."

"Oh," Alex sighed, and then pressed his mouth against John's once more. He grabbed John's cock in his hands, and began silkily running his fingers up and down it.

"Oh, baby girl," John whispered. He kissed at Alex's neck. Alex sighed happily. 

"I'll never get over how big your dick is," Alex said. John laughed. 

"You're fucking relentless," he said, running his hand over Alexander's ass. Alex moaned under the touch. "How would this even work," John continued, flipping the two of them over so that John was now on top. "Don't we need.... um, supplies?"

Alex grinned mischievously, and squirmed out from underneath him. He crawled over to the other edge of the bed, went on his stomach and began rummaging in the cabinet next to the bed. John watched helplessly from the other side of the bed. Eventually, he pulled out a bottle of lube and a condom, all while showing off his incredible ass to John. 

"Come on babe," Alex said teasingly, gesturing for him to come join him. John crawled over to Alexander, kissing him again. He cradled Alex's ass in his lap for a while until Alex moved his hand to his entrance.

"Come  _on_ babe," he whined, rolling his hips towards John. "I  _need_ you to fuck me, please, I need you inside me,  _come on."_

"Ok," John chuckled. He grabbed the lube and poured a generous amount in his hands. Alex rearranged himself so that he was on his back, legs propped up, just  _waiting_ to be entered.

"John," Alex whined again. He grabbed around, and pulled John into a searing kiss. "Hurry up."

"Chill," John said, smiling, as he pressed a light finger against Alex' entrance. Alex gasped.

John reached up and kissed him, and  _finally_ slid a finger in. Alex moaned really loudly.

"Baby girl," John half whispered. 

"Hmmm?" Alex said back, looking at him through half-lidded eyes.

"Literally shut the fuck up you don't have to be that loud." Alex laughed, and grinded on John's finger.

"You ok?" John asked him as he moved his finger in and out of Alex slowly. Alex laughed.

"Am I ok?" he said mockingly. "I'm on fucking heaven right now, and it would be even better if you would just add another one."

John smiled, leaning up and kissing Alex. "Ok then," he said, and added another finger. Alex moaned wantonly in John's mouth. 

John began sucking at Alex's neck. "You look so pretty baby girl," he whispered. Alex gasped, and arched his back.

"Faster," he moaned. "Please, faster, please John, please."

"Shhh," John said, tugging at his earlobe with his teeth. He added another finger in, moving around in that impossibly tight heat.

And then John curled his fingers and found Alex's prostate, and Alex pretty much shouted.

"Oh, FUCK, John," he yelled. He started grabbing at him. "John, fuck, John, come on," he growled. John detached himself from Alex's neck.

"You sure, baby girl?" he asked softly.

Alex looked at him. "Yes, I'm fucking sure, come on, hurry up," he said. John shrugged, and put the condom on.

"You ready," he asked, aligning them. 

"I think I'm ready," Alex said softly.

"Ok." John slowly slid himself in, evoking a guttural moan from both of them. "Oh, fuck," John swore softly.

"Come on," Alex moaned when John was fully inside of him. "Move."

John looked up at him incredulously. "Baby girl, if I move now, I'm gonna come and this is gonna be all over."

"Weak," Alexander said teasingly. John bit down on Alex's shoulder in response, drawing another moan from him.

"Oh, so that's how it's gonna be," Alex said, and then clenched down on John's cock. 

John drew in a sharp breath. " _Goddammit,_ Alexander." Alex smirked, and dit it again. 

"Oh, so that's how it's going to be," John repeated, composing himself. He grabbed Alex's wrists, and moved them up above of Alex's head, effectively pinning him down. He kissed him languidly, and began a relentless pace, thrusting into Alex.

Alexander moaned from underneath him, writhing around. "You feel so good," he gasped out. 

"You've told me," John replied dryly. He then changed his angle, slamming onto Alex's prostate on every thrust, and Alexander screamed.

"I love you, I love you, I love you," Alex babbled as he kissed John messily. John's thrusts became erratic as he started to go over the edge. 

John kissed him frantically as Alex came, throwing his head back and clenching around John's cock. John moaned in his neck, and came messily inside him .

John sighed, pulling out and stripping off the condom. "You ok?" John said, laying next to Alex. Alex turned his head to face John, and looked at him affectionally. 

"I don't think I can walk." John laughed, lazily tracing patterns on Alex's chest. 

"We should probably get back, huh," he said, kissing him softly. 

"John, babe, I don't think you understand. I. Don't. Think. I. Can. Walk."

John slung his arm possessively over Alex. "I guess I'm just gonna have to carry you bridal style."

"Oh," Alex said, blushing. John smirked, and placed a kiss on his forehead.

They lay there for a long while, cuddling (with the occasional "Ow, Alex, you're literally elbowing my stomach" and the "What was that!" "I was stretching." "You punched me in the face!"), and just enjoying each other's company for until they had to leave Hogwarts. After a few hours, John got them both up and off their asses, cause they had to pack and lord knows neither of them packed in advanced. 

And yes, John did carry Alex bridal style back to their dorms.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

"I'm gonna miss you all so much!" Eliza said as they waited for the train to arrive.

"I hate you all," Angelica said, looking at her nails. Eliza slapped her arm.

"It's just that you are all such great friends," Eliza continued, a lot less positive. "And I'm not gonna see you, for like another three months-"

"'Liza, we're gonna be stuck on a train together for the next like 8 hours," Angelica said.

Alex chuckled from where he stood, leaning against John. Well, they were both leaning against each other, half asleep cause they did just pull an all nighter having sex and then packing. 

"But now it's time to say our goodbyes," Eliza said. "Alexander are you all right?"

"I'm fine," Alex murmured sleepily. Angelica rolled her eyes.

"I'm going to go find Maria," she said, walking away. Eliza rolled her eyes, and continued saying her goodbyes, despite the fact that they were going be stuck on that train for another 8 hours.

Finally, the train came, and the group got on. They found compartment for themselves, squishing the whole Revolutionary Crew inside. Peggy was on top of Herc, cuddling, Laf and Georges were squished together, and Eliza was there. Those guys were on one side. The other side consisted of Maria and Angelica, who were holding hands, Maria's head was on Angelica's shoulder and from time to time Angelica would press kisses to her head. And it consisted of Alex and John, who tried to maintain conversation for the first hour but then promptly fell asleep on top of each other. (It was adorable. Eliza took a picture, and Angelica applauded her for that, saying "Good job Eliza! We could use that as blackmail!") The group joked on like that, until they had to tearfully part ways at Platform Nine and Three Quarters.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS FINALLY DONE FINALLY THANK GOD  
> and wow im bad at writing porn  
> BUT HEY ITS DONE AND NOW I CAN START WRITING OTHER RANDOM SHIT WITHOUT FEELING TOO BAD  
> UM  
> YEA THATS ABOUT IT  
> history of japan voice: bye


End file.
